Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-07-31
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 7.0)
The Line graph compares the number of jobs of four sector such as manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare of United states from the year 1960 to year 2020.
Overall, it is apparent that retail and healthcare sector experienced significant increament whereas manufacturing and agriculture went through downward trend over the period of year.
To begin with, the manufacturing sector accounted for 15 milliion jobs in year 1950, afterwards it went up and recorded for its peak 20 million jobs in the year 1980. From 1980 to 2020 it gradually fell and recorded roughly 13 million jobs, whereas initially agriculture sector accounted for approximately 6 million jobs and went through a gradual decline over the period of year and reached 3 million jobs in 2020.
In contrast, the retail sector was having only 6 million jobs in the year 1960 but afterwards it experienced a continuous increament till the year 2000 then remain steady untill 2020 and recorded at 16 million jobs. The healthcare sector went through a dramatic rise thoughout the decades and stood at the same figure as retail sector in the year 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 7.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 7.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.5 |
| Overall | 7.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0
You have successfully identified the main trends and provided a clear overview of the data. You covered all four sectors and made relevant comparisons, such as contrasting the growth in healthcare and retail with the decline in manufacturing and agriculture. However, there is a factual error in your first paragraph where you mention the year 1950, which is outside the provided timeframe of 1960–2020. Additionally, ensure that your data points are precise; for example, stating the manufacturing peak was in 1980 is accurate, but ensure all figures align closely with the visual data provided to maintain high accuracy.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.5
The response is logically organized with a clear introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs that group the sectors effectively (declining vs. growing). You use cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'In contrast', and 'whereas' to link ideas. However, the flow is occasionally slightly mechanical. The transition between the overview and the body paragraphs could be smoother. Paragraphing is used appropriately, and the progression of ideas is easy to follow throughout the text.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.5
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'accounted for', 'downward trend', and 'dramatic rise'. There are some minor spelling errors, such as 'increament' (increment) and 'untill' (until). Additionally, 'recorded for its peak' is slightly unnatural phrasing. To reach a higher band, try to incorporate more precise collocations and ensure spelling accuracy. The vocabulary is sufficient to convey your meaning clearly, but it lacks the sophistication and flexibility required for higher band scores.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5
You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While your meaning is generally clear, there are several grammatical slips, such as 'four sector such as' (should be plural 'sectors'), 'United states' (needs capitalization), and 'the period of year' (should be 'the period'). There are also issues with article usage, such as 'the retail sector was having' (should be 'had'). While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. Focus on subject-verb agreement and consistent use of articles.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.
