Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-07-31

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 7.0)

The line chart illustrates the changes in the number of jobs in four different sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020. These sectors are classified as Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture and Healthcare.

Overall, the Manufacturing sector has been observed as the most prioritized job sector until 2000, but experienced a drop later. Retail and Healthcare industries have been increasing their demand. In contrast, the Agriculture industry is to be found as the least preferable for jobs in 2000.

Manufacturing sector was most popular in 1960 with around 15 million jobs, it enhanced more jobs with 20 million in 1980 but suddenly experienced a dramatic decline with around 17 million and around 13 million jobs in 2000 and 2020 respectively. Agriculture sector was the second in lead during 1960 with 6 million jobs approximately, but it experienced a consistent drop offering around 3.5 million jobs in 1980 and 2000, eventually lowering its demand with 2 million jobs in 2020.

Both Retail and Healthcare sectors are observed to gradually optimizing their jobs. Initially, Retail was sideways with Agriculture with 6 million during 1960, then it paced with 10 million jobs in 1980 and 15 million in 2000, ending as most popular with around 16 million jobs in 2020. Ultimately, Healthcare also took a gradual upgrade in its position from being least popular in 1980 with 3 million jobs to enhancing its path with 5 million and 11 million in 1980 and 200 respectively, emerging as most popular with 16 million jobs in 2020, sideways with Retail sector.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

The response covers all parts of the task, providing a clear overview and highlighting key trends for all four sectors. You successfully identified the main features, such as the decline in Manufacturing and Agriculture, and the growth in Retail and Healthcare. However, there are some inaccuracies in the data reporting; for instance, you mention 2000 as a year for Healthcare data twice with different figures, and the description of the trends could be more precise. To reach a higher band, ensure that the data points cited are consistently accurate and that the comparison between sectors is more clearly linked to the specific years provided in the graph.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The essay is logically organized into paragraphs, with a clear introduction, overview, and body paragraphs focusing on different sectors. The progression of ideas is generally clear. You use some cohesive devices like 'In contrast', 'Overall', and 'Initially', which help the flow. However, some transitions are slightly mechanical or repetitive, and the referencing could be smoother. For example, the phrase 'sideways with' is not a standard cohesive device for comparing data. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that each paragraph has a clear thematic focus will enhance the overall coherence.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'illustrates', 'prioritized', 'dramatic decline', and 'gradually optimizing'. However, there are instances of awkward word choice and collocation errors, such as 'enhanced more jobs', 'sideways with', and 'taking a gradual upgrade'. These errors do not impede communication, but they do limit the precision of your writing. To improve, focus on using more natural collocations for describing trends, such as 'experienced a significant increase' instead of 'enhanced more jobs'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are several grammatical errors, such as 'Manufacturing sector was most popular' (missing an article), 'Agriculture sector was the second in lead' (awkward phrasing), and '200 respectively' (likely a typo for 2000). There are also issues with tense consistency and preposition usage. To achieve a higher score, work on subject-verb agreement, the correct use of articles, and ensuring that complex sentences are constructed accurately without errors that distract the reader.

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