Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-07-31
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 6.5)
The provided line graph illustrates how many jobs were there in the US economy by the period between 1960 and 2020 sector-wise, jobs' numbers are measured in millions and four sectors are manufacturing, retail, agriculture, and healthcare respectively.
Overall, retail and agriculture saw an uprising trend, whereas manufacturing and healthcare saw totally an opposite trend. By the end of the period, retail and agriculture Jobs' number was totally identical.
In the year 1960, agriculture jobs were around six millions, while retail market jobs were at about two to three millions. By 1980, retail was at five millions and agriculture was double than that of retail. Both saw a significant increase by 2000 before becoming figuratively similar by the next year.
Regarding manufacturing and healthcare, manufacturing was proportionately more than three times of healthcare at the begining of yhe period. By the next decade (1980), manufacturing peaked at 20 millions, while healthcare jobs fell to around four millions. However, both sectors experienced a considerable decline over the remaining period.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 7.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response covers all parts of the task by identifying the main trends and making relevant comparisons. However, there are significant inaccuracies in the interpretation of the data. For instance, you state that manufacturing and healthcare saw an 'opposite trend' to retail and agriculture, but the graph shows all four sectors declining after 2000. Additionally, you claim manufacturing was 'more than three times' healthcare at the beginning, which is not supported by the visual data. While the main features are identified, the lack of precision in reporting the data points limits the score. To improve, ensure that your summary of trends strictly aligns with the visual evidence provided in the graph.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0
The response is organized into logical paragraphs, with an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. There is a clear progression of ideas, and cohesive devices such as 'In the year 1960', 'By the next decade', and 'However' are used to link information. While the structure is generally sound, the logical flow is occasionally hindered by the inaccurate data reporting mentioned in the task achievement section. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the different sectors, which helps the reader follow the comparison. Overall, the organization is clear and functional.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.5
The range of vocabulary is adequate for the task, using terms like 'illustrates', 'proportionately', and 'considerable decline'. However, there are some awkward word choices and inaccuracies, such as 'uprising trend' (should be 'upward trend') and 'figuratively similar' (which is misused here). There are also minor spelling errors like 'yhe' and 'millions' (when used with a specific number, 'million' should not be pluralized). While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey the main points, it lacks the precision and flexibility required for a higher band score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'how many jobs were there in the US economy by the period' (awkward phrasing) and 'agriculture was double than that of retail' (should be 'double that of'). Subject-verb agreement and pluralization issues (e.g., 'jobs' numbers') occur throughout the text. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to suggest a lack of control over complex structures. Focusing on sentence construction and proofreading for basic errors would improve the clarity of your writing.
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