Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-07-31
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The line graph illustrates the number of jobs in various sections of the US economy including manufacturing, retail, agriculture, and healthcare in six decades from 1960 to 2020.
The horizontal axis is showing the number of years and vertical axis is illustrating 25 million jobs in 60 years. Among these variations, manufacturing has shown a great number of jobs starting from 15 millions with a constant increase of 5 millions till 1980 and after that it started declining till the end of 2020. Likewise, retail and healthcare showed the same behavior of constant increase in the first four decades with a slight lower increase in the next 20 years in comparison to the last 40 years but at the end they gave the same number of jobs. Although, the starting point of retail and agriculture are same i.e around 6 millions. There was a decline in agriculture jobs since the start with approximately 2.5 million jobs in 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response covers all four sectors and identifies the main trends. However, the description of the data is somewhat inaccurate. For instance, stating the vertical axis illustrates '25 million jobs' is a misinterpretation of the graph's scale. Additionally, the analysis of the trends is slightly confusing; for example, the claim that retail and healthcare 'gave the same number of jobs' at the end is not clearly supported by the visual data. While the main features are highlighted, the lack of precision in reporting the figures and the vague comparisons prevent this from reaching a higher band. To improve, ensure that data points are read accurately and comparisons are made with specific reference to the provided figures.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The response is organised into two paragraphs, which is a logical approach for a short report. There is a basic attempt at progression, moving from an introduction to the body of the data. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and occasionally awkward, such as 'Among these variations' and 'Likewise'. The referencing is sometimes unclear, making it difficult for the reader to follow the comparison between sectors. Improving the flow between sentences by using a wider variety of linking words and ensuring that the relationship between ideas is explicitly stated would enhance the coherence of the response.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to describe trends such as 'constant increase' and 'declining'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice, such as 'sections' instead of 'sectors' and 'variations' when referring to the data trends. The range of vocabulary is somewhat limited, relying on repetitive phrasing. To achieve a higher score, the writer should aim to use more precise terminology related to data description, such as 'fluctuated', 'peaked', or 'remained stable', and avoid using general terms that do not accurately reflect the specific nature of the information presented in the graph.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'The horizontal axis is showing' (should be 'shows'), 'starting point of retail and agriculture are same' (should be 'is the same'), and '15 millions' (should be '15 million'). These errors are frequent enough to be noticeable but do not completely impede communication. The control over articles and subject-verb agreement needs improvement. To progress, the writer should focus on ensuring consistency in tense usage and correcting basic errors in pluralisation and article usage to improve the overall accuracy of the writing.
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