Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-07-31

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 7.0)

The graph chart shows the information of jobs in four sectors of economy and the estimate number of workers in US between 1960 to 2020.

Overall, retail and healthcare showed a huge growth over the period where manufacture and agriculture goes down by the period.

Firstly , in 1960 , manufacturing company was in top position with 15 millions workers which continued to 1980 and it reached to 20 millions workers . But after 80's , technology started to take over and manufacturing sector faced a downward trend. In 2020 , it reached to 13 million. Beside manufacture, agriculture also followed the same algorithm. Started with 6million workers in 1960 , goes down to 3million and stayed stable for 20 years, but after 2000 again it started to go down.

On the other hand, retail and healthcare followed the opposite trend. From 1960 to 2020, both sector showed growth. With a little over 5 millions jobs in retail in 1960 ,it reached over 15 millions jobs in 2020. The greatest growth showed in healthcare sector . In 60 years , healthcare jobs reached more than 15 millions.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response7.0
Coherence and Cohesion7.0
Lexical Resource6.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy6.5
Overall7.0

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

You have successfully identified the main trends and provided a clear overview of the data. You covered all four sectors and made relevant comparisons between the declining sectors (manufacturing and agriculture) and the growing ones (retail and healthcare). However, the response could be improved by providing more precise data points for the final year (2020) for all sectors to ensure the summary is fully comprehensive. The description of the trends is generally accurate, though the use of the word 'algorithm' to describe economic trends is inappropriate in this context.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The response is logically organized into an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. You use some cohesive devices such as 'Firstly', 'But', 'Beside', and 'On the other hand' to link ideas. However, some transitions are slightly mechanical or misused, such as 'Beside manufacture' (should be 'Besides manufacturing') and the transition between the two body paragraphs could be smoother. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the declining sectors from the growing ones, which helps the reader follow the progression of your argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'downward trend', 'stable', and 'opposite trend'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation. For example, 'graph chart' is redundant, 'manufacturing company' should be 'manufacturing sector', and 'algorithm' is not the correct term for a trend. Additionally, there are minor errors in pluralization, such as '15 millions workers' instead of '15 million workers'. Expanding your range of descriptive verbs and adverbs would help elevate your score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement and article usage (e.g., 'both sector showed growth' should be 'both sectors showed growth', and 'the greatest growth showed in healthcare' should be 'the greatest growth was seen in the healthcare sector'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with unnecessary spaces before commas. These errors do not impede communication, but they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher band score.

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