Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-07-31

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The graph represents the information of number of jobs in the four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020. It shows the increasing trend of manufacturing jobs upto 20 millions and a massive decrease to 13 millions. However, the agriculture field seems to have a significant increase throughout the years. Other two jobs also seem to be increase or decrease in the specific terminals of years.

One the one hand, jobs of retail in economy of US increase from 5 million at the year 1960 to 2000 and got a static level on the year of 2020. Likewise, the jobs of agriculture field also rise from 1960 to 2020.

On the other hand, the manufacturing jobs go on to 20 million and faced a balanced fall. Moreover, the portion of healthcare goes down from starting point of 5 millions and got the lowest value of 3 millions.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response attempts to summarize the main features of the graph, but it fails to accurately report the data. For instance, the claim that agriculture increased significantly is contradicted by the graph, which shows it remaining relatively stable or declining. Furthermore, the description of the trends is vague, using terms like 'specific terminals of years' rather than identifying clear time periods or specific data points. The overview is missing, and the report lacks a clear comparison between the sectors. To improve, you must ensure that the data reported matches the visual information provided and include a clear summary of the overall trends at the beginning of the response.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate. For example, 'One the one hand' and 'On the other hand' are used, but the content following these markers does not present a logical contrast. Additionally, referencing is sometimes unclear, such as in the phrase 'Other two jobs', which does not specify which sectors are being discussed. The progression of ideas is somewhat disjointed, making it difficult to follow the comparison between the four sectors over the sixty-year period.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The range of vocabulary is limited and repetitive. You frequently use the word 'jobs' and 'increase' or 'decrease' without much variation. There are also issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'specific terminals of years' and 'balanced fall', which do not accurately describe the trends shown in the graph. To reach a higher band, you should incorporate more precise vocabulary related to data description, such as 'fluctuated', 'remained stable', 'peaked', or 'declined steadily'. The current vocabulary is sufficient for basic communication but lacks the precision required for an academic task.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response contains a mix of simple and some attempted complex structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'information of number of jobs' (should be 'information on the number of jobs'), 'upto 20 millions' (should be 'up to 20 million'), and 'Other two jobs also seem to be increase' (should be 'seem to increase'). Subject-verb agreement and article usage are inconsistent throughout the text. While the meaning is generally understandable, the high frequency of errors in basic sentence construction prevents the response from reaching a higher band.

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