Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-01

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The given line graph depicts that the distinct jobs in four sectors such as manufacuring, retail, agriculture and healthcare in the US in years from 1960 to 2020. The information is given into jobs in millions.

Overall, it can be derived that the majority of population working in factories in former year while, healthcare job is least preferable, over passing time healthcare and retailing job most famous in the end of periods.

Initially, merely 1 millions job available in healthcare field in starting year, it was sharply climb at 5 in 1980 till it was reach to peak at more than 15 millions in 2020, which was the highest ratio in 2020. Additionally, the similar job ratio of retail and agriculture at 5 millions job. Afterward, the retail job consistently inclind at 15 in 2000 and then slightly moved upto 15 miilions in 2020 whereas, farming sectors job dropped over the year from 5 to 1 millions, in years between 1960 and 2020.

Furthermore, production houses jobs was available at 15 millions in 1960, after an decades which was gradually rose by 20 and then declined somewhere in vicinity at 14 millions in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response covers all four sectors and identifies key trends, such as the growth in healthcare and the decline in agriculture. However, the overview is slightly confusing due to grammatical inaccuracies, and some data points are imprecise (e.g., 'production houses' instead of manufacturing). While the main features are reported, the comparison between sectors could be more clearly structured to highlight the shift in the US economy over the 60-year period. The response meets the requirements of the task but lacks the analytical precision expected for a higher band.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the information. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or awkward, such as 'after an decades' or 'over passing time'. The progression of ideas is generally logical, but the transition between the overview and the body paragraphs is abrupt. Referencing is occasionally unclear, making it difficult to track which sector is being discussed at certain points. Improved use of linking words would enhance the flow.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The range of vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks sophistication. There are several instances of word-choice errors, such as 'production houses' for manufacturing, 'famous' to describe job trends, and 'ratio' when referring to raw numbers. Spelling errors are also present, such as 'manufacuring', 'inclind', and 'miilions'. While the meaning is generally clear, the limited range and recurring errors prevent the response from reaching a higher band. Using more precise terminology for data description would be beneficial.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout. Issues include incorrect verb tenses ('was available', 'was reach'), missing articles, and awkward phrasing ('it was sharply climb'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma usage. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to be noticeable and detract from the overall quality of the writing. More attention to subject-verb agreement and sentence construction is needed.

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