Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-01
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 6.5)
The line graph reveals data on the employment figures across four economic sectors in the US from 1960 to 2020, with the numbers presented in millions.
Overall, there has been a combination of both increasing and declining trends in the US job market throughout the study period. It is clear that the agricultural sector saw a steady drop in terms of job availability, whereas the retail and healthcare sectors consistently became more prevalent.
In 1960, job opportunities for both the retail and healthcare fields stood at negligible figures before substantially rising to a significant number of approximately 15 million by the end of the six-decade period. As for the agricultural arena, the number of jobs went down from over 5 million to roughly 2.5 million in 1980 until 2000. This figure further dropped slightly
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.5 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which significantly impacts the task achievement score. Furthermore, the essay is incomplete, ending abruptly mid-sentence. While you successfully identified the main trends—the decline in agriculture and the growth in retail and healthcare—the analysis is underdeveloped due to the premature conclusion. To improve, ensure you complete the description of all four sectors and provide a more comprehensive overview of the data. Because the response is unfinished and under-length, it cannot fully address all parts of the task as required for higher bands.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction and an overview paragraph. You use cohesive devices such as 'whereas' and 'as for' to link ideas effectively. However, because the text ends abruptly, the overall progression is disrupted, and the final paragraph is missing. To reach a higher band, ensure that your response is fully developed and that you use a wider range of cohesive devices to connect sentences and paragraphs more fluidly. The current structure is coherent but lacks the necessary completion to demonstrate full control over paragraphing and logical flow.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.5
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'prevalent,' 'negligible,' and 'economic sectors' appropriately. There is an attempt to use less common vocabulary, which is a positive sign. However, the limited length of the response restricts your ability to showcase a wider range of lexical items. To improve, focus on using more precise collocations related to data description, such as 'witnessed a downward trend' or 'experienced a sharp increase.' The current vocabulary is sufficient to convey meaning but lacks the flexibility and precision required for higher bands.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5
The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, such as the opening sentence and the comparison using 'whereas.' There are no major grammatical errors in the text provided, and the punctuation is generally accurate. However, the range of structures is somewhat limited, and the abrupt ending prevents the use of more sophisticated grammatical forms. To achieve a higher score, aim to incorporate a greater variety of complex sentence structures, such as passive voice or participle clauses, and ensure that your sentences are consistently error-free throughout the entire piece.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.
