Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-01

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line graph compares the data about the various jobs in four fields of the economy in the United States from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, it can be seen that the retail and healthcare sectors demand significantly increased throughout the period. The Manufacturing and agriculture sectors demand dramatically decreased after the two decade.

In 1960, The Manufacturing sector had 15 millions jobs; whereas, The Healthcare field had approximately 3 millions jobs. The Retail and Agriculture remained the same numbers of jobs, which were noted by around 7 millions jobs. In 1980, The Manufacturing sector jobs dramatically rose, which reached 20 millions jobs, while The Agriculture sector jobs demand significantly decreased by nearly 3.5 millions jobs. The Retail and Healthcare fields jobs dramatically increased by 10 and 5 millions respectively.

In 2000, The Manufacture sector had only 16 millions jobs, it was reached around 13 millions in 2020. The Retail and Healthcare sectors jobs dramatically increased until 2020, which were remain same nearly 16 millions. The Agriculture sector steadily decreased by approximately 2 millions jobs.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response covers the main features of the graph, identifying key trends such as the growth in retail and healthcare and the decline in manufacturing and agriculture. However, the data reporting is inconsistent and occasionally inaccurate. For instance, stating that manufacturing reached 20 million in 1980 contradicts the visual data, and the description of the 2000-2020 period is confusingly phrased. While the overview is present, the lack of precision in data interpretation prevents a higher score. The response would benefit from more careful verification of the figures against the graph to ensure the summary is factually accurate.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, with an introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs focusing on specific time periods. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'In 1960', 'In 1980', and 'In 2000', which help guide the reader through the timeline. However, some transitions are mechanical, and the referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the sentence 'which were remain same nearly 16 millions'. The progression of ideas is generally logical, but the internal structure of the sentences sometimes hinders the flow of information.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks precision and variety. The student relies heavily on basic verbs like 'increased' and 'decreased' and often uses them with incorrect collocations (e.g., 'demand significantly increased' instead of 'the number of jobs increased'). There are also issues with word forms, such as 'Manufacture' used as an adjective instead of 'Manufacturing'. To improve, the student should focus on using more varied reporting verbs and nouns, and ensure correct word forms are used in context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Common issues include incorrect pluralisation ('15 millions jobs'), subject-verb agreement errors ('which were remain same'), and awkward phrasing ('it was reached around 13 millions'). While the meaning is generally understandable, the high frequency of these errors limits the score. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for plural forms and verb tenses would significantly improve the accuracy of the writing.

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