Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-01
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 6.5)
This graph illustrates the information about the number of jobs in different four sectors of the economy in the US between six decades from 1960 to 2020.
Overall, it can be clearly seen that jobs are increasing continously in health and retail sector. In manufacturing sector, jobs are showing variability whereas agriculture sector is showing no change.
To begin, In 1960, 15 million jobs are available in manufacturing sector, 6 million jobs are in both retail and agriculture sector but, least 2 million in health sector. In 1980, manufacturing sector grew upto 20 million as well as 10 million in retail sector and 5 million in health sector. But, jobs was drop down in agriculture sector. In 2000 to 2020, jobs decreased continously in manufacturing sector while, jobs increased in both retail and health care sector. But, number of jobs in agriculture sector continously same from 2000 to 2020.
Consequently, jobs increased continously in retail and health care sector but manufacturing sector showed varaibility.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5
The response covers the main features of the graph, identifying trends in the four sectors. However, the analysis is somewhat superficial and lacks precision. For example, the description of the agriculture sector as 'showing no change' is a good observation, but the data points provided for other sectors are occasionally inaccurate or lack sufficient detail to fully support the trends described. The overview is present but could be more effectively integrated to highlight the most significant shifts over the 60-year period. To improve, ensure that data points are cited accurately and that the comparison between sectors is more clearly articulated throughout the report.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the information. There is a clear attempt to use cohesive devices such as 'To begin', 'Consequently', and 'while', although some of these are used mechanically or with minor errors in punctuation. The progression of ideas is generally logical, moving from an overview to specific details. However, the referencing is sometimes repetitive, and the flow between sentences could be improved by using a wider variety of linking words to connect the data points more fluidly rather than listing them in a sequence.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, allowing the student to describe trends such as 'increasing continuously' and 'variability'. However, the range is limited, and there are several instances of awkward word choice or repetition, such as 'jobs was drop down' and 'continously same'. There are also minor spelling errors like 'continously' (continuously) and 'varaibility' (variability). To reach a higher band, the student should aim to use more precise collocations and a wider range of synonyms to describe economic trends, avoiding the repetitive use of the word 'jobs'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
The response contains a mix of simple and some attempted complex sentence structures. There are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement ('jobs are increasing', 'jobs was drop down') and tense usage. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with unnecessary commas and capitalization issues. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to be noticeable. To improve, the student should focus on mastering basic sentence construction and ensuring that verbs agree with their subjects, as well as refining the use of articles and prepositions in a descriptive context.
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