Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-01
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 7.0)
The line graph illustrates changes in employment number across four distinct US economic sectors from 1960 to 2020.
Overall, Healthcare and retail saw substantial job growth over the 60-year period,while menufacturing and agriculture experienced overall declines.Noteably,Healthcare emerged as the largest employing sector by 2020,overtaking menufacturing.
In 1960, menufacturing was the lading sector with 15 million jobs.This figure peaked at 20 million in 1980 before steadily dropping to 16 million in 2000 and more to 12 million by 2020.
In contrast,Healthcare stared as the smallest sector with just 2 million jobs but grew consistently throughout the period,finishing at peak of 16 million in 2020.Meanwhile,the retail sector began at approximately 6 million jobs,diping slightly in 1980 before surging to 15 million in 2000,where is stablized until 2020.
On the other hand, agriculture experince a continuous downward,plummeting from around 6 million jobs in 1960 to just 1 million by the end of the time period.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 7.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 7.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.5 |
| Overall | 7.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.5
The response successfully addresses all parts of the task. You have identified the main trends and provided a clear overview of the changes in the four sectors. Key features, such as the growth in Healthcare and the decline in Agriculture, are highlighted with relevant data points. The comparison between sectors is effective, particularly the observation regarding Healthcare overtaking manufacturing. The information is accurate based on the provided graph, and the structure allows for a logical presentation of the data. To reach a higher band, ensure that all data points are cited with complete precision and avoid minor omissions in the description of trends.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0
The response is logically organized with a clear introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs that group the sectors effectively. Cohesive devices such as 'In contrast', 'Meanwhile', and 'On the other hand' are used to guide the reader through the comparisons. However, there are some minor issues with punctuation and spacing, such as missing spaces after commas and periods (e.g., 'period,while', '2020,overtaking'). While the progression of ideas is clear, these mechanical errors slightly affect the flow. Improving the consistency of spacing and punctuation would enhance the overall coherence.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.5
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'substantial job growth', 'plummeting', and 'surging' to describe trends effectively. However, there are several spelling errors throughout the text, such as 'menufacturing' (repeatedly), 'lading' (leading), 'stared' (started), 'diping' (dipping), and 'experince' (experienced). These errors are noticeable and detract from the professional tone of the report. While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey the intended meaning, the frequency of spelling mistakes limits the score in this criterion.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5
The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There is a good attempt at using varied sentence beginnings and comparative structures. However, there are recurring grammatical and mechanical errors, such as missing spaces after punctuation, subject-verb agreement issues (e.g., 'agriculture experince'), and minor phrasing errors (e.g., 'where is stablized' instead of 'where it stabilized'). While these errors do not impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. Focusing on proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy and punctuation spacing will significantly improve your performance.
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