Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-02
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 7.0)
The line graph illustrates data regarding the amount of employment in the Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture, and Healthcare sectors of the economy in the US from 1960 to 2020.
Overall, it is clear that over the 60 years, Healthcare and Retail sectors showed rapid growth, whereas the Agriculture and Manufacturing industries moved to a downward trajectory.
In 1960, the Manufacturing industry had the highest number of jobs available, which was 15 million, while the Healthcare sector stood at approximately 2.5 million jobs, which was the least among all industries. Retail and Agriculture sectors were at the same number of jobs (around 6 million). By 1980, the Manufacturing sector increased dramatically and reached 20 million jobs, whereas the Agriculture division moved to a slight decrease and consisted of 4 million jobs.
By 2020, Retail and Healthcare departments displayed gradual growth over the time period and reached nearly 16 million as well as both industries became the highest sectors. The Agriculture sector demonstrated constant jobs from 1980 to 2020, which was the lowest category in 2020. However, the Manufacturing industry decreased slowly from 20 million in 1980 to under 15 million in 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 7.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 7.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 7.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 7.0 |
| Overall | 7.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0
The response covers all key features of the graph, including the trends for all four sectors. You successfully identified the main trends, such as the growth in Healthcare and Retail and the decline in Manufacturing and Agriculture. The overview is clear and provides a good summary of the data. However, there are some inaccuracies in the data reporting; for example, you stated that Manufacturing reached 20 million in 1980, but the graph shows it peaking earlier and declining by 1980. Additionally, the description of the Agriculture sector as 'constant' from 1980 to 2020 is slightly inaccurate as there is a visible downward trend. More precise data interpretation would improve the score.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.5
The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, overview, and body paragraphs. The progression of ideas is easy to follow. You use some cohesive devices like 'whereas', 'however', and 'in 1960', which help link the information. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes a bit mechanical. To reach a higher band, try to vary your linking phrases and ensure that the transition between sentences feels more natural. The paragraphing is appropriate, with each paragraph focusing on a specific aspect of the data, which helps the reader navigate the information effectively.
Lexical Resource — Band 7.0
You demonstrate a sufficient range of vocabulary to describe trends, such as 'downward trajectory', 'gradual growth', and 'dramatically'. These terms are appropriate for an Academic Task 1 response. There are some minor issues with word choice, such as 'amount of employment' (should be 'number of jobs' or 'employment levels') and 'departments' when referring to economic sectors. While these errors do not impede communication, they prevent the use of vocabulary from being considered sophisticated. Expanding your range of synonyms for 'increase' and 'decrease' would further enhance your lexical score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 7.0
You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, such as the use of 'whereas' and 'which' clauses. Most sentences are clear and easy to understand. There are some grammatical slips, such as 'the least among all industries' (should be 'the lowest') and 'reached 16 million as well as both industries became the highest sectors' (which is a slightly awkward construction). Punctuation is generally accurate. To improve, focus on ensuring that your complex sentences are grammatically sound and that your subject-verb agreement is consistent throughout the text.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.
