Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-02

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates , showing in four sectors regarding wealth in the US form. All jobs in millions and every 20 year gap in 80 years.

Overall , healthcare started at millions and rose every year and stopped near 15 millions . Secondly , agriculture and retail both started from 6 millions . However, both were moving in the direction agriculture was going into decline every year and stopped 2 millions whereas , retail continued to increase year by year and ended 16 million. Lastly , manufacturing started with 15 million and 20 year increase at the that decline .

In summary , healthcare and retail both increase every year but manufacturing and agriculture decrease.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which significantly impacts the development of the task. While you have identified the four sectors and attempted to describe the trends, the analysis is superficial and lacks the necessary detail to fully address the prompt. Key data points are missing or inaccurately described, such as the starting points for healthcare and the specific trends for manufacturing. To improve, ensure you provide a more comprehensive overview of the data, including specific figures and clear comparisons between the sectors throughout the 60-year period.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organised into paragraphs, but the flow of ideas is disjointed. The use of cohesive devices is mechanical and sometimes inaccurate, such as the transition 'Secondly' which does not logically follow the previous sentence. The referencing is also unclear at times, making it difficult for the reader to follow the progression of the data. To improve, use a wider variety of linking words and ensure that each paragraph has a clear focus, with sentences that logically connect to one another to create a smoother narrative.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is limited and repetitive, relying heavily on basic verbs like 'started', 'rose', and 'increase'. There are also issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'regarding wealth in the US form' and '20 year increase at the that decline', which are unclear and do not accurately describe the graph. To reach a higher band, you should aim to use more precise terminology related to trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'peaked', 'remained stable', or 'experienced a sharp decline', and avoid repeating the same basic verbs.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response contains frequent grammatical errors, including issues with sentence structure, articles, and verb tenses. For example, 'All jobs in millions' is a fragment, and 'stopped near 15 millions' contains an unnecessary plural. Many sentences are poorly constructed, which hinders clarity. While there is an attempt at simple and some complex structures, the high frequency of errors often causes difficulty for the reader. Focus on mastering basic sentence construction, ensuring subject-verb agreement, and using correct punctuation before attempting more complex grammatical structures.

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