Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-02

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The Graph displays information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

It is clear that there were more than 15 millions jobs were available in the manufacturing setor after that it grows to 20 million in the year 1980 but after 1980 it constantly falls down near to 13 millions jobs till 2020. Retail sector shows a consistent growth as in the year 1960 the job available in the industry were near to 5 million and it steadily grows till 2020 and remain near to 15 million. The healthcare sector also shows a clear and constant growth whereas in the year 1960 the jobs available were near to 2 million which grows consistently near to 15 million by the year 2020. The agriculture sector displays an agreeing downfall, the job available in the domain were near to 5 million in the year 1960 which drops to 2 million in the year 2020.

In conclusion, the retail and healthcare domain shows the consistent growth across the past whereas manufacturing and agriculture sector shows a steady downfall during the same period.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

You have successfully identified the main trends for all four sectors, covering the period from 1960 to 2020. You provided a clear overview in the conclusion and included relevant data points to support your descriptions. To reach a higher band, ensure you avoid minor inaccuracies in data reporting; for example, you mentioned the manufacturing sector fell to 'near 13 million' by 2020, whereas the graph shows it closer to 10 million. Additionally, ensure your overview highlights the most significant trends, such as the clear divergence between the growth of service-related sectors and the decline of traditional industries, rather than just listing the data for each sector individually.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The response is logically organized, with each sector discussed in its own sequence. You have used basic cohesive devices to link your ideas, such as 'whereas' and 'in conclusion'. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and the paragraphing is limited. To improve, try to group the sectors by their trends (e.g., those that grew versus those that declined) to create a more sophisticated structure. Additionally, ensure that your referencing is precise; for instance, the phrase 'after that it grows' is slightly vague and could be improved by using more specific transition words to indicate time progression.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

You have a sufficient range of vocabulary to convey the main features of the graph, using terms like 'consistent growth', 'steady downfall', and 'sector'. However, there are some word choice errors, such as 'agreeing downfall', which is not a natural collocation in this context. To improve, focus on using more precise academic vocabulary to describe trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'peaked', or 'surpassed'. Your spelling is generally accurate, but expanding your range of descriptive adverbs and verbs will help you achieve a higher score by demonstrating more flexibility in your language use.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are several grammatical errors that occur throughout the text, such as 'there were more than 15 millions jobs were available' (double verb) and 'the job available in the industry were' (subject-verb agreement). These errors do not impede communication, but they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement and avoid redundant structures. Practicing the use of relative clauses and passive voice would also help you demonstrate a wider range of complex structures with greater accuracy.

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