Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-02

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line graph depicts the variation in the numbers of jobs of four distinct sectors of the economy of the United States namely - manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare, in 60-years period, beginning in 1960.

Overall, among all the four sectors job trends in healthcare and retail initiated from different number of jobs, but by the end, secured the first position together. Whereas agriculture sector steadily decline throughout the period and stood at the last position.

In 1960, manufacturing dominated in the economy against other sectors by having 15 jobs. The upward trend of manufacturing continued and rose sharply to 20 jobs in 1980. However, eventually this trend reversed and by the end of 2020 number of jobs fall to nearly 13. Completely different trend was observed for retail which started with nearly 6 jobs in 1960 and steadily followed downward trend till 1960. After which this numbers w

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which negatively impacts the score. Furthermore, the essay is incomplete, ending abruptly mid-sentence ('After which this numbers w'). While the introduction and overview identify the main trends, the body paragraphs are underdeveloped due to the incomplete nature of the text. The data reporting is also inconsistent; for instance, the claim that retail followed a 'downward trend till 1960' is chronologically impossible given the graph starts in 1960. To improve, ensure all data points are accurately described and the response is fully completed.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay uses basic paragraphing and some cohesive devices like 'Overall' and 'However' to link ideas. However, the progression of information is interrupted by the abrupt ending, which prevents a logical conclusion. The referencing is sometimes unclear, such as the vague mention of '15 jobs' without specifying units (e.g., millions). The flow is mechanical, and the lack of a completed final paragraph hinders the overall coherence of the report. To improve, focus on using a wider range of linking words and ensure that each paragraph has a clear, completed structure.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks the precision required for higher bands. Phrases like 'secured the first position' and 'stood at the last position' are functional but repetitive. There are minor issues with word choice, such as 'variation in the numbers of jobs of four distinct sectors' which is slightly awkward. The range of vocabulary is limited, relying on basic descriptors rather than more sophisticated academic terminology related to trends and data analysis. Expanding your repertoire of trend-related verbs and nouns would significantly improve your score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent errors in grammar and punctuation. For example, 'namely - manufacturing' uses incorrect punctuation, and 'number of jobs fall to nearly 13' contains a tense error (should be 'fell'). The phrase 'in 60-years period' is grammatically incorrect (should be 'a 60-year period'). While these errors do not always impede communication, they are frequent enough to limit the score. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and correct article usage will help improve accuracy.

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