Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-03

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates the number of job in manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare sectors in the US from 1960 to 2020.

Examining the information about the manufacturing industry, the highest proportion was noted for manufacturing sector, ranging from 15 million to 20 million from 1960 to 1980. By contrast, it experienced a steady decline between 20 million and 13 million after the decades.

By 1960, the figure for retail sales jobs observed a gradual rise over the period, indicating a sharp growth and became a dominant job category. A similar trend can be observed in healthcare at nearly 2 million to 15 million throughout the year, it experienced a peak popularity as retail sector. However, the healthcare sector noticed declines dramatically in the year 1960 and 1980, having remained stable over the last year.

Overall, although manufacturing jobs recorded the highest figure initially, it declined significantly. The retail and healthcare sectors became dominant categories over the period.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response covers all four sectors and identifies the main trends, such as the decline in manufacturing and the growth in retail and healthcare. However, the analysis is somewhat superficial. For instance, the description of the healthcare sector is confusing, stating it 'noticed declines dramatically in the year 1960 and 1980', which contradicts the visual data showing a steady upward trend. Furthermore, the comparison between sectors is limited. To reach a higher band, you should ensure that the data points cited are accurate and that the overview clearly contrasts the divergent paths of the four sectors rather than just listing them.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, with an introduction, body paragraphs for the trends, and an overview. Cohesive devices such as 'By contrast', 'A similar trend', and 'Overall' are used to guide the reader. However, the flow within the second body paragraph is slightly disjointed due to the inaccurate description of the healthcare data. The referencing is generally clear, but the transition between the description of retail and healthcare could be smoother to better highlight the comparison requested in the prompt.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'proportion', 'dominant job category', and 'steady decline'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'peak popularity' to describe a job sector and 'noticed declines' when referring to data trends. These errors do not impede communication, but they limit the precision of your report. To improve, focus on using more precise reporting verbs and nouns that are commonly associated with describing statistical trends in graphs.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'number of job' (should be plural 'jobs'), 'after the decades' (unclear usage), and 'throughout the year' (inaccurate for a multi-decade period). While these errors are noticeable, they do not prevent the reader from understanding the main points. To achieve a higher score, you should work on subject-verb agreement and ensure that your prepositional phrases accurately reflect the timeframes provided in the graph.

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