Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-03

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

This graph illustrates the economy job in the US between the era of [redacted phone].There are four sectors .i will discuss one by one with the help of this chart. The first one is the manufacturing sector. In 1960, the number of jobs is round about 15 then in 1980 its turn at peak level but in 2000 the number of jobs becomes low as before then, in 2020 its at low level. Then Retail, in 1960 the number of jobs is very low but year by years its high at the 2020 it becomes higher. Now agriculture in 1960 the number of jobs is bit high but the 1980 and 2000 its medium and then in 2020 its very low. In 1960 the number of jobs in healthcare is minimum but 1980 its starting high at the end of 2020 it's become higher .in conclusion, the retail and healthcare is more successful than others.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses the task by identifying the four sectors and describing their trends. However, the analysis is superficial and lacks a clear overview of the main trends. The data reporting is imprecise, using vague phrases like 'round about 15' and 'bit high' without referencing the units or specific timeframes effectively. The conclusion is overly simplistic and does not synthesize the data well. To improve, you should group the sectors by their trends (e.g., those that increased versus those that declined) and provide a clear summary of the most significant changes observed over the 60-year period.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The response is organized into a single paragraph, which makes it difficult to follow. There is a lack of logical progression between sentences, and the use of cohesive devices is very limited. Phrases like 'The first one is...' and 'Then Retail...' are mechanical and repetitive. The lack of paragraphing hinders the overall structure, as there is no clear separation between the introduction, the body of the report, and the conclusion. Using transition words such as 'In contrast,' 'Furthermore,' or 'Conversely' would help to link ideas more effectively.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is quite limited and repetitive. You frequently use basic terms like 'high', 'low', and 'number of jobs'. There is little attempt to use academic or topic-specific vocabulary related to economic trends (e.g., 'fluctuated', 'plummeted', 'surged', 'steady growth'). The phrasing 'the era of 1960-2020' is slightly unnatural, and the word choice throughout is basic. To reach a higher band, you should incorporate a wider range of synonyms and collocations to describe trends and data points more precisely.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response contains frequent grammatical errors, including issues with subject-verb agreement ('the number of jobs is'), tense inconsistency ('its turn at peak level'), and punctuation. Sentence structures are simple and repetitive, often relying on 'In [year] the number of jobs is...'. There is a lack of complex sentence structures, which limits the range. Errors such as 'its at low level' (missing 'it is') and 'year by years' (incorrect pluralization) are common. Focusing on basic sentence construction and ensuring consistent verb tenses would significantly improve the clarity of your writing.

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