Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-03

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The provided line graph delineates data regarding the changes in the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US over a sixty-year period spanning from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, it is immediately salient that healthcare experienced a remarkable upward trend, whereas the converse was true for agriculture, which witnessed a steady decline throughout the timescale. Additionally, the most dramatic growth was registered in retail.

In terms of the detailed statistics, healthcare commenced at approximately 2 million in 1960 and subsequently surged dramatically to reach a peak of 16 million in 2020. Following this exponential growth, the figures plateaued consistently at this high for the remained of the period. Likewise, retail started at 6 million in 1960 and then increased significantly to 16 million over the period.

By striking contrast, agriculture followed a completely inverted trajectory. The data plummet sharply from 6 million in 1960, before hitting a rock-bottom of merely 2 million in 2020. Thereafter, this category experienced wild fluctuations until the final year. Similarly, manufacturing started at 15 million in 1960 and then decreased minimally to 13 million over the period.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

Javob barcha to‘rtta sektorni qamrab oladi va asosiy tendensiyalarni samarali aniqlaydi. Siz sog‘liqni saqlash va chakana savdodagi o‘sish hamda qishloq xo‘jaligidagi pasayish kabi asosiy xususiyatlarni muvaffaqiyatli ta’kidlab o‘tdingiz. Biroq, ma’lumotlarni talqin qilishda ba’zi noaniqliklar mavjud. Masalan, siz qishloq xo‘jaligi 'wild fluctuations'ni boshdan kechirganini va sog‘liqni saqlash uchun ko‘rsatkichlar 'plateaued' bo‘lganini aytasiz, bular taqdim etilgan grafik bilan tasdiqlanmaydi. Bundan tashqari, ishlab chiqarishning 'minimally' pasayishi haqidagi tavsif biroz noaniq. Yuqoriroq bandga erishish uchun ma’lumotlar bo‘yicha xulosangiz taqdim etilgan vizual ma’lumotlarga qat’iy mos kelishiga ishonch hosil qiling va aniq ko‘rinmaydigan tendensiyalarni ortiqcha talqin qilishdan saqlaning.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

Javob mantiqiy jihatdan aniq kirish, umumiy sharh va ikkita asosiy xatboshidan iborat holda tashkil etilgan. Siz taqqoslashlar davomida o‘quvchini yo‘naltirish uchun 'In terms of', 'By striking contrast' va 'Likewise' kabi bog‘lovchi vositalardan foydalanasiz. Xatboshilash umumiy sharhni aniq ma’lumotlardan ajratish uchun mos ravishda ishlatilgan. G‘oyalarning rivojlanishi umuman olganda aniq, garchi sektorlar tavsifi o‘rtasidagi o‘tish yanada silliqroq bo‘lishi mumkin edi. Havola qilish (referencing) asosan samarali, garchi bog‘lovchi iboralarning xilma-xilligidagi ba’zi kichik yaxshilanishlar oqimni yanada kuchaytiradi.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

Siz 'delineates', 'salient', 'exponential growth' va 'inverted trajectory' kabi atamalardan samarali foydalanib, yaxshi lug‘at boyligini namoyish etasiz. Bu kamroq uchraydigan leksik birliklardan foydalanishga urinishni ko‘rsatadi. Biroq, so‘z tanlashda ba’zi kichik noaniqliklar mavjud, masalan, 'remained of the period' (o‘rniga 'remainder' bo‘lishi kerak) va 'The data plummet' (o‘rniga 'The data plummeted' bo‘lishi kerak). Ushbu kichik xatolarga qaramay, lug‘at boyligingiz fikringizni aniqlik va uslub bilan yetkazish uchun yetarli. To‘g‘ri kollokatsiyalarga (so‘z birikmalariga) doimiy e’tibor qaratish ushbu mezon bo‘yicha yuqoriroq ball olishingizga yordam beradi.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

Siz 'The provided line graph delineates data regarding the changes...' va 'The data plummeted sharply... before hitting a rock-bottom' kabi oddiy va murakkab gap tuzilmalarining aralashmasidan foydalanasiz. Garchi 'remainder' o‘rniga 'remained' kabi grammatik xatolar va zamon nomuvofiqliklari (masalan, 'plummeted' o‘rniga 'The data plummet') mavjud bo‘lsa-da, bular muloqotga to‘sqinlik qilmaydi. Gaplaringizning aksariyati aniq va yaxshi tuzilgan. Yaxshilash uchun tarixiy ma’lumotlarni tasvirlashda o‘tgan zamondan izchil foydalanishga ishonch hosil qiling va ega-kesim moslashuviga ko‘proq e’tibor bering.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.