Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-03
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line chart illustrates the trend followed by four different sectors namely manufacturing, retail, agriculture, healthcare between the year 160 and 2020 in the United States market. The scale of job is in millions.
Overall, it is evident that the manufacturing sector had the highest number of job openings among other three. Retail and healthcare showed increasing trend whereas, agriculture showed decreasing trend.
To begin with, there were around 15 million at the starting which increased to 20 in 1980 and started declining and in the final 2020 it crashed around 17 million jobs. Moreover, for the first 20 years retail and healthcare were parallel in the chart with 2 million and 6 million and by 1980 reached till 5 and 10 millions respectively. Both the sectors kept on increasing and at last crossed each other at 16 million jobs in year 2020.
However, there was year-on year decline in agriculture sector which began with 6 million in year 1960 and started falling rapidly to 3.5 in 1980. Also, in year 2000 there were nearly only 3 million jobs and finally in the year 2020 it recorded it's lowest at 2 million jobs.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers all four sectors and identifies the main trends. However, the overview is slightly underdeveloped, and there are inaccuracies in data reporting. For instance, the manufacturing sector is described as having the highest number of jobs, yet the chart shows it starting at 15 million and ending at 17 million, while other sectors show different patterns. The mention of '160' instead of '1960' is a significant oversight. While the main features are highlighted, the lack of precision in data interpretation and the typo in the date range prevent this from reaching a higher band.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is logically organized into paragraphs, with an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. Cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'Moreover', and 'However' are used to guide the reader. However, the referencing is sometimes unclear; for example, the phrase 'there were around 15 million at the starting' lacks a clear subject. Additionally, the transition between the retail and healthcare descriptions is slightly mechanical. The overall progression is clear, but the use of cohesive devices could be more sophisticated and varied to improve the flow between sentences.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The range of vocabulary is adequate for the task, using terms like 'declining', 'parallel', and 'recorded'. However, there are instances of imprecise word choice and awkward phrasing, such as 'crashed around 17 million' and 'reached till 5 and 10 millions'. The repetition of 'sector' and 'jobs' is noticeable. While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey the main points, it lacks the flexibility and precision required for a higher band. Spelling errors like 'it's' (possessive 'its') also detract from the overall quality.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'namely manufacturing, retail, agriculture, healthcare' (missing articles), 'the year 160' (typo), and 'reached till 5 and 10 millions' (incorrect preposition and pluralization). While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to limit the score. The control over punctuation and sentence structure is inconsistent, and the writer would benefit from focusing on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles when discussing data points.
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