Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-04

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The line graph illustrates information about the number of jobs in four different sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, the highest sector was manufacturing from the year 1960 to the year 2000 due to the fact that there were 20 million jobs over there. The lowest sector was healthcare from the year 1960 to 1980. But in 2000 to 2020 this sector grew and rich to 15 million people finding jobs in 2020.

Firstly, in this line graph the first manufacturing sector was the sector above the three constantly in 2000. But after 2000 the sector decreased. The second sector was inconstantly increased. But after 2000 to 2020 the sector was stable at least there were 15 million jobs in that sector. Sector was inconstantly increased. But after 2000 to 2020 the sector was stable at least there were 15 million jobs in the sector.

Secondly, the third agricultural sector was in 1960 there was only 5.5 million jobs available. But as compared to the years 1980 to 2000 that sector constantly decreased to only 4 million jobs are available. The last sector healthcare was dramatically increased in 1980 to 2020. There was in 1960 only 4 million jobs were available but in 2020 there was more available reaching 15 million.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response covers all four sectors and identifies some key trends, such as the rise of the healthcare sector and the decline of manufacturing. However, the analysis is hampered by significant inaccuracies in data interpretation. For example, stating that manufacturing had 20 million jobs 'over there' is vague, and the description of the trends is often confusing or contradictory, such as the repetitive and unclear explanation of the second sector. The overview is present but lacks precision, failing to clearly highlight the most significant shifts across the entire period. To improve, focus on accurately describing the data points and ensuring the main trends are clearly contrasted.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the logical progression within paragraphs is weak. The use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or misused, such as the repetitive use of 'But after 2000 to 2020' and 'The second sector was inconstantly increased.' The referencing is sometimes unclear, making it difficult to track which sector is being discussed. The repetition of sentences in the third paragraph significantly disrupts the flow of information. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that each sentence builds logically upon the previous one would greatly enhance the coherence of the response.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The range of vocabulary is limited and often repetitive. Phrases like 'inconstantly increased' and 'rich to 15 million' are inaccurate and unnatural. The student relies on basic descriptors and struggles with precise terminology for describing trends (e.g., 'the highest sector was manufacturing'). There are also issues with word choice, such as 'over there' and 'finding jobs,' which are too informal for an academic report. To reach a higher band, the student should learn and apply specific collocations for describing graphs, such as 'fluctuated,' 'remained stable,' or 'experienced a sharp decline.'

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response contains a mix of simple and some attempted complex structures, but grammatical errors are frequent and sometimes impede clarity. There are consistent issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'there was only 5.5 million jobs') and tense usage (e.g., 'the third agricultural sector was in 1960 there was...'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, and sentence fragments appear throughout the text. While the meaning is generally understandable, the high frequency of errors in basic sentence construction prevents the response from reaching a higher band. Focusing on basic sentence structure and proofreading for subject-verb agreement would be beneficial.

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