Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-04
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The line graph illustrate the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in US between 1960 to 2020.
In an overview, the increasing job sectors from 1960 to 2020 was in retail and healthcare, in the 2020 both were reached about 15 million. And the lowest number of job is in agriculture, also in the 1960 the manufacturing sectors was high in that year and in 2020 it have been decreased.
Firstly, the two sectors that are retail and healthcare. From 1960 to 2020 these both sectors has widely increased from 5 million to 15 million. But in the case of healthcare it was started from about 1 million and in 2020 it ended with 15 million. However, the retail sector was started from 5 million.
Secondly, in the manufacturing and agriculture sector these are the lowest number of job in the economy. In the line graph this shows that the manufacturing sector once had high number of jobs were in 1980 it was 20 million. The
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response attempts to summarize the main features, but the analysis is incomplete and lacks clarity. While you identify the upward trends in retail and healthcare, the description of the manufacturing and agriculture sectors is fragmented and ends abruptly, leaving the task unfinished. The overview provided is somewhat confusing, as it mixes specific data points with general trends. To improve, ensure you provide a clear, distinct overview of the main trends without including specific figures, and ensure all four sectors are fully described. The current response fails to provide a complete summary of the provided data, which significantly impacts the score.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay uses basic cohesive devices such as 'Firstly' and 'Secondly', but the logical flow is disrupted by the incomplete nature of the final paragraph. Paragraphing is attempted, but the structure is weak because the information is not grouped effectively; for example, the overview paragraph contains specific data that should be reserved for the body paragraphs. Referencing is sometimes unclear, and the transition between ideas feels mechanical rather than fluid. To improve, focus on grouping related information (e.g., rising trends vs. declining trends) and ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that guides the reader through the data.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is limited and repetitive. You rely on basic verbs like 'increased', 'started', and 'ended', which restricts your ability to describe the trends with precision. There are also issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'the increasing job sectors... was in retail', which is grammatically and lexically awkward. To reach a higher band, you should incorporate a wider range of vocabulary related to data trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'peaked', 'remained stable', or 'experienced a sharp decline'. Using more precise terminology will help you convey the information more effectively.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('The line graph illustrate', 'these both sectors has widely increased') and tense inconsistencies ('it have been decreased'). The sentence structures are mostly simple, and there is a lack of complex sentence forms. The final sentence is incomplete, which is a significant error. To improve, focus on mastering basic subject-verb agreement and ensure you use consistent tenses when describing past data. Practice combining simple sentences into complex ones using relative clauses or subordinating conjunctions to demonstrate a wider range of grammatical control.
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