Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-04

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

the line graph illustrates the data of jobs available in four sectors in the US economy from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, retail sector and health sector were provide low jobs in the starting but ended with highest job providers in 2020. manufacturing sector's graph reached 20 million which is highest, while agriculture sector was always low in between these years.

To begin with manufacturing sector, there are 15 million posts was available in 1960 which increase with 5 million in 1980s, it was the highest of all time in all four sectors. Retail and agriculture sectors were provided same jobs around 6 million in 1960. After 20 years retail sector provides double jobs with 10 million when agriculture has downgrade with only 3 million jobs. healthcare provides least employment with only 2 million jobs, but it was slowly growing and in 2000 it provide 6 million jobs, that is six times higher than starting.

Manufacturing sector was shown downfall after 1980s and there were 14 million jobs it provides in 2020. Retail sector shown uplift till 2020 and provides 16 million jobs which is highest in this sector. healthcare sector follows the same path as retail sector. agriculture sector ended with 2 million jobs in 2020 which was lower as compare to1980.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response covers the main features of the graph, identifying the trends for the four sectors. However, the overview is slightly inaccurate; for instance, the retail sector did not start with low jobs compared to others, and the claim that manufacturing reached 20 million is not supported by the data provided. While the key trends are identified, the reporting of figures is inconsistent and occasionally imprecise. The response would benefit from a more careful selection of data points to support the main trends, rather than listing figures that do not align with the graph. The overall summary is present but lacks the clarity required for a higher band.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate, such as 'To begin with manufacturing sector' and 'Retail sector shown uplift'. The progression of ideas is sometimes disjointed, particularly when moving between sectors. Referencing is occasionally unclear, and the flow between sentences could be improved by using a wider range of linking words that connect the data points more logically. While the paragraphing is functional, the internal cohesion within paragraphs needs more attention to ensure a smooth reading experience.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks the precision and range expected at higher levels. There is frequent repetition of basic verbs like 'provide' and 'increase'. Some word choices are awkward or incorrect, such as 'downgrade' instead of 'declined' and 'uplift' used as a verb. The student attempts to use sector-specific terminology, but the overall range is limited. To improve, the student should focus on using more varied verbs to describe trends (e.g., 'fluctuated', 'surpassed', 'plummeted') and ensure that collocations are used correctly to convey information more naturally.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Common issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'retail sector and health sector were provide'), incorrect tense usage (e.g., 'manufacturing sector was shown downfall'), and missing articles. While the meaning is generally understandable, the frequency of these errors is high. The student should focus on mastering basic sentence construction, particularly tense consistency when describing past data, and ensuring that pluralisation and article usage are accurate throughout the text.

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