Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-04
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
the graphs illustrates the number of jobs in the four sectors of US economy from the year between 1960 to 2020.
overall the most significant growth was seen in the year 1990 of about 15 million jobs in manufacturing and this dropped in the 2000 with only 12 million jobs. the slight increase and decrease in the agriculture job was seen from year 1990 to 2020 with 6 million to 3 million. a rapid growth was seen in the retail job from 1990m with only 6 million jobs to increasing to about 15 million in the year 12020
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0
The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which significantly impacts the score. Because the response is only 98 words, the information is severely underdeveloped. You have failed to report on all four sectors mentioned in the prompt, focusing only on three, and the data points provided are often inaccurate or poorly contextualized. To improve, you must ensure you cover all categories shown in the graph and provide a more comprehensive overview of the trends over the entire 60-year period rather than focusing on isolated years.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The response lacks a clear structure. While there is an attempt at an overview, the paragraphing is non-existent, and the logical progression of ideas is hindered by the brevity of the text. Cohesive devices are largely absent, making the transition between the different sectors feel disjointed. To improve, you should organize your response into clear paragraphs: an introduction, an overview of the main trends, and two body paragraphs detailing specific data points with appropriate linking words like 'in contrast', 'furthermore', or 'consequently'.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is quite limited and repetitive. You rely on basic phrases such as 'slight increase and decrease' and 'rapid growth'. There is also a lack of precision in describing the data, and the terminology related to economic sectors is not fully utilized. To reach a higher band, you need to incorporate a wider range of vocabulary to describe trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'peaked', 'remained stable', or 'experienced a sharp decline', and ensure you use these terms accurately in the context of the graph.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including issues with subject-verb agreement ('the graphs illustrates'), incorrect preposition usage ('in the year 1990 of about'), and awkward phrasing ('in the year 12020'). The sentence structures are simple and lack the complexity required for higher bands. You should focus on mastering basic sentence construction before attempting more complex structures. Pay close attention to articles, verb tenses, and ensuring that your sentences are complete and grammatically sound.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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