Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-04

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

A line graph here illustrates the number of jobs in the four sectors of US economy between the year 1960 to 2020.

Overall, 1980 was the year where a significant growth was seen in manufacturing and in the same year a sharpest decline was noticed but in a different category.

Looking at the data in more detail, 20 million manufacturing jobs were seen in 1980 moreover it sharply declined in 2020 with only 12 million jobs. Furthermore, agricultural jobs with 6 million in 1960 to decreasing to 2 million by the year 2020 showing a gradual drop.

For instance, In the year 1960, a drop of 6 million retail jobs were seen which significantly increased by the year 2020 with 15 million jobs. Moreover in the year 1960 healthcare suffered with lowest of 2 million opportunities and slowly increased to 15 million by the same year 2020 but with different category

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response covers the main features of the graph, but the analysis is inconsistent and lacks precision. While you identify trends for the four sectors, the reporting of data points is often confusing or inaccurate. For example, stating that 1980 saw a 'sharpest decline' in a different category without naming it is vague. Furthermore, the description of the retail sector starting with a 'drop' in 1960 is not supported by the typical interpretation of such graphs, and the concluding phrase 'but with different category' is unclear. To improve, ensure that every trend is clearly linked to the correct sector and that data points are cited accurately to support your comparisons.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or misused. Phrases like 'For instance' are used incorrectly, as the following sentence is not an example of the previous point but rather a new piece of data. Additionally, the transition 'but with different category' at the end of the final paragraph is confusing and disrupts the flow of information. To reach a higher band, focus on using linking words that accurately reflect the logical relationship between your ideas, such as 'in contrast' or 'similarly'.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The range of vocabulary is adequate for the task, but it lacks the precision required for a higher score. You rely on basic descriptors like 'significant growth' and 'sharpest decline'. There are also instances of awkward phrasing, such as 'healthcare suffered with lowest of 2 million opportunities', which is not a standard collocation in this context. To improve, try to incorporate more precise academic vocabulary related to trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'plateaued', or 'experienced a downward trend', and ensure that your word choices are contextually appropriate for describing economic data.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. For example, 'the year 1960 to 2020' should be 'the years 1960 to 2020' or 'the period between 1960 and 2020'. You also have issues with preposition usage and article omission, such as 'in the same year 2020'. While the meaning is generally understandable, these recurring errors prevent the writing from being considered accurate. Focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of prepositions when describing time periods and data points.

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