Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-04

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line graph illustrates changes in employment levels (in millions) in the United States for four sectors, manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare, over the span of 40 years.

Overall, the number of jobs saw a rise in retail and healthcare sectors, while that of manufacturing and agriculture experienced fluctuations.

In 1960, the number of jobs in manufacturing started at the highest, 15 millions, followed by retail and agriculture, both at about 6 millions. While the employment in healthcare was the lowest (approximately 2 millions). The number of employment in manufacturing rose significantly until 1980, 20 millions, then decreased gradually and stood at about 13 millions in 2020. In terms of agriculture, the figure dimmed until 1980, reaching about 3 millions, then finally reached around 2 millions in 2020.

Meanwhile, number of jobs in retail showed an upward trend, reaching 15 millions in 2000, then increased moderately and stood at about 16 millions in 2020. Healthcare followed similar trend, leveled with retail in 2020 (16 millions).

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

You have successfully identified the main trends and provided a clear overview of the data. You covered all four sectors and made relevant comparisons, such as noting the convergence of retail and healthcare in 2020. However, the task asks for data from 1960 to 2020, and your introduction mentions a 'span of 40 years', which is factually incorrect based on the provided dates (60 years). Additionally, some data points are slightly imprecise; for instance, stating manufacturing started at '15 millions' is acceptable, but ensure you are consistent with pluralization (e.g., '15 million'). Overall, the key features are well-selected and the response is well-structured.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The response is logically organized with a clear introduction, overview, and body paragraphs. You use cohesive devices such as 'Meanwhile', 'In terms of', and 'followed by' to guide the reader through the data. Paragraphing is used effectively to separate the different sectors. To reach a higher band, ensure that referencing is more precise; for example, in the final paragraph, 'Healthcare followed similar trend' requires an article ('a similar trend'). The flow between sentences is generally smooth, though some transitions could be more varied to avoid a slightly mechanical feel.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'fluctuations', 'upward trend', and 'moderately'. There are some minor errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'the figure dimmed' (which is not standard for describing graph trends) and 'number of employment' (which should be 'employment levels' or 'the number of people employed'). While you attempt to use varied vocabulary, some phrasing is slightly unnatural. Improving your control over collocations related to data description will help you achieve a higher score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical slips, such as missing articles ('the number of jobs', 'the healthcare sector') and incorrect pluralization ('15 millions' should be '15 million'). You also have some minor punctuation and phrasing issues, such as '1980, 20 millions', which lacks a verb or preposition to connect the year to the data point. While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher band score. Focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.