Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-05
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The line graph shows the information about the number of jobs in four different (Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture and Healthcare) sectors of the economy in the US between [redacted phone].
Overall, the highest number of jobs in the manufacturing sector was recorded in the year 1980 as compared to other years(1960, 2000 and 2020).
It is surprisingly see that there is big difference between from the year 1960 to 2000 in the Retail sector, and in Retail and healthcare departments there are similar numbers of jobs people were like to do in the year 2020. The number of people decreasing from the year 1980 to 2020 in manufacturing sectors and following the same trend until 2020.
In the Retail sector, the number of jobs people like to work increased from the year 1960 to 2020. It is noticeable that the number of jobs in agriculture department was same in between two years ([redacted phone]) and after 20 years in 2020 that amount was little bit decreased.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response covers the main features of the graph, but the analysis is somewhat superficial. While you identify the trends for the four sectors, the reporting of data is imprecise. For example, you mention 'big difference' and 'little bit decreased' without referencing the specific figures provided in the graph. To achieve a higher band, you should incorporate more specific data points (e.g., approximate numbers or percentages) to support your descriptions. Additionally, the overview provided is quite limited; it focuses only on the manufacturing sector rather than summarizing the most significant trends across all four sectors, such as the overall growth in retail and healthcare compared to the decline in agriculture and manufacturing.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the logical progression between sentences is sometimes weak. The use of cohesive devices is limited and occasionally repetitive (e.g., 'from the year... to the year...'). Some transitions feel mechanical, and the relationship between ideas could be smoother. For instance, the transition between the overview and the body paragraphs is abrupt. Improving the use of linking words such as 'consequently,' 'in contrast,' or 'furthermore' would help connect your observations more effectively and improve the overall flow of the report.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision required for a higher band. You rely on basic phrasing such as 'number of jobs people like to work' and 'departments,' which is not the most accurate terminology for economic sectors. There are also some awkward collocations, such as 'It is surprisingly see that.' To improve, focus on using more academic vocabulary related to data description, such as 'fluctuated,' 'remained stable,' or 'experienced a downward trend.' Expanding your range of synonyms will help you avoid repetitive phrasing and demonstrate a more sophisticated command of the language.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally hinder clarity. Examples include 'It is surprisingly see that there is big difference' and 'the number of people decreasing from the year 1980.' There are also issues with article usage and prepositional phrases. While the meaning is generally clear, the frequency of these errors prevents the writing from reaching a higher band. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of tense when describing historical data will significantly improve the accuracy of your writing.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.