Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-05

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates four different job sections of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, manufacturing remained the highest for the majority of the period which later got overtaken, while healthcare and retail experienced the largest growth across the timeframe. In contrast agriculture was consistently the lowest during most of the period.

In 1960, Manufacturing was the biggest employer in the US with around 15 million employee's followed by retail and agriculture with both accounting for just over 5 million. Healthcare was the smallest sector with around 3 million workers. By 1980 manufacturing reached a peak of 20 million, during the same period retail steadily rose to 10 million followed by healthcare that rose to 5 million. During this time agriculture witnessed significant decline to only 3 million.

In 2000, retail and healthcare continued grow at a similar rate, retail with 15 million and healthcare with just over 11 million workers. Manufacturing on the other hand faced the biggest dip that gone to 12 m

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response covers the main features of the graph, including the trends for all four sectors. You have successfully identified the key shifts, such as manufacturing's peak and decline, and the growth of healthcare and retail. However, the response is incomplete; it cuts off abruptly at the end of the final paragraph, failing to provide a full summary of the data up to 2020. This lack of completion means the task is not fully addressed, as the final decade of the period is missing. To reach a higher band, ensure you complete your analysis of all data points provided in the prompt.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is logically organized into an introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs. You use some cohesive devices such as 'In contrast', 'By 1980', and 'In 2000' to guide the reader through the timeline. However, the abrupt ending disrupts the flow and coherence of the final paragraph. Paragraphing is used appropriately, but the sudden termination of the text makes the overall structure feel unfinished. To improve, ensure that your conclusion or final body paragraph is fully developed and logically connected to the preceding information.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'illustrates', 'accounted for', 'witnessed significant decline', and 'sector'. There are some minor errors, such as 'job sections' instead of 'job sectors' and 'employee's' (possessive) instead of 'employees' (plural). While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey the main points, it lacks the precision and variety required for higher bands. Attempting to use more sophisticated synonyms for 'growth' or 'decline' would enhance your score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, including 'which later got overtaken' (awkward passive construction), 'continued grow' (missing 'to'), and 'that gone to' (incorrect verb tense). Punctuation is generally acceptable, but the incomplete sentence at the end significantly impacts the grammatical integrity of the final section. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement and ensuring that complex structures are formed accurately. Proofreading for small errors like missing prepositions or incorrect verb forms will help increase your score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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