Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-05

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The line graph illustrates amount of jobs in four different sectors of economy in use from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, it can be clearly seen that health care and retail sector showed the upward trend as the manufacturing and agriculture declined after period of two decades.

To begin with, manufacturing sector started with nearly 15 million jobs in 1960 which inclined to approximately 20 million in two decades before showing the downward trend for next twenty years with roughly 17 million jobs in 2020, where the agriculture sector started with nearly 5 million jobs in 1960 which decreased to roughly 3 million in 1980 and remains steady for next forty years with approximately 2.5 million jobs in 2020.

Moving forward to, retail sector begin with nearly 5 million Jobs in 1960 which inclined to 15 million jobs in 2000 and remains nearly same with 16 million in 2020. Moreover , healthcare started with nearly 2 million jobs in 1960 which increases significantly for rest of the time period with nearly 15 million jobs in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response covers all four sectors and identifies the main trends, such as the growth in healthcare and retail versus the decline in manufacturing and agriculture. However, the overview is slightly underdeveloped; while it mentions the trends, it lacks a clear synthesis of the most significant changes or a comparison of the final figures. The data points are generally accurate, though some descriptions of the trends could be more precise to better highlight the 'main features' as required by the task. Overall, the response provides a sufficient summary of the information presented in the graph.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, with an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. Cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'Moving forward to', and 'Moreover' are used to guide the reader, although some transitions feel slightly mechanical or forced. The progression of ideas is generally clear, moving from the sectors that declined to those that grew. However, the referencing is occasionally repetitive, and the paragraphing could be improved by grouping the sectors more effectively to allow for better comparative analysis rather than simply listing the data for each sector individually.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The range of vocabulary is adequate for the task, with terms like 'upward trend', 'downward trend', and 'remains steady' used appropriately. However, there are several instances of awkward phrasing and word choice errors, such as 'amount of jobs' (should be 'number of jobs'), 'in economy in use' (should be 'in the US economy'), and 'inclined to' (which is not the correct collocation for describing numerical growth). While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey the meaning, it lacks the precision and flexibility required for a higher band score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout. Issues include missing articles (e.g., 'in manufacturing and agriculture'), incorrect verb tenses (e.g., 'retail sector begin' instead of 'began'), and punctuation errors (e.g., 'Moreover ,'). While these errors do not impede communication, they are persistent and demonstrate a lack of control over complex structures. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement and the consistent use of past tense when describing historical data.

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