Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-05

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph tracks the changes in the number of jobs in manufacturing, retail, agriculture, and healthcare sectors of the US economy between 1960 to 2020. The units are measured in millions.

Overall, retail and healthcare sectors employment increased dramatically over the period, while manufacturing jobs fluctuate. In contrast, agricultural workers considerably decline.

In 1960, manufacturing jobs was the largest sector, with 15 millions jobs, this figure rose in 1980 by 20 millions, before falling significant around 13 millions in 2020. Moreover, retail workers leapt by 6 millions to 15 millions from 1960 to 2000, before reaching 16 millions in 2020.

Healthcare employment soared throughout the period. It grew from around 3 millions jobs in 1960 to 5 millions in 1980, while steadily soar at 16 millions followed by next 40 years. However, agriculture sector jobs began with 6 millions in 1960, which declined continuously till 2020 by 2 millions.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response provides a clear overview of the main trends and selects relevant data points to support the description. You successfully identified the contrasting trajectories of the four sectors. However, there are inaccuracies in the data reporting. For example, you state manufacturing reached 20 million in 1980, which is not supported by the graph, and the description of the healthcare sector's growth is slightly confusing. To improve, ensure that the figures cited align precisely with the visual data provided. While the main features are highlighted, more careful attention to the specific numbers would elevate the response to a higher band.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, overview, and body paragraphs. You use cohesive devices such as 'In contrast', 'Moreover', and 'However' to signal shifts in the narrative. Paragraphing is used appropriately to group related information. However, the flow between sentences is occasionally mechanical, and some transitions feel slightly forced. To improve, try to vary your linking phrases and ensure that the progression of ideas within paragraphs is smoother, particularly when moving between different sectors of the economy.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using words like 'fluctuate', 'leapt', and 'soared' to describe trends. However, there are some issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'before falling significant' (should be 'significantly') and 'followed by next 40 years'. These errors do not impede communication, but they do limit the precision of your writing. To reach a higher band, focus on using adverbs and adjectives more accurately and ensure that your collocations sound natural in an academic context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, which is appropriate for this task. However, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement and pluralization, such as 'manufacturing jobs was' instead of 'were', and '15 millions jobs' instead of '15 million jobs'. Additionally, the phrase 'while steadily soar' is grammatically incorrect. While these errors do not prevent the reader from understanding your meaning, they occur frequently enough to impact the overall fluency of the text. Focusing on basic grammatical accuracy will significantly improve your score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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