Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-05

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph tracks the changes in the number of jobs in the manufacturing, retail, agriculture, and healthcare sectors of the US economy between 1960 and 2020. The units are measured in millions.

Overall, the retail and healthcare employment increased dramatically over the period, while manufacturing jobs fluctuated. In contrast, agricultural workers considerably declined.

In 1960, manufacturing jobs were the largest sector, with 15 million jobs, this figure rose in 1980 by 20 million, before falling significantly to 13 million in 2020. Moreover, retail workers leapt by 6 million to 15 million from 1960 to 2000, before reaching 16 million in 2020.

Healthcare employment soared throughout the period. It grew from 3 million jobs in 1960 to 5 million in 1980, while steadily soaring at 16 million followed by next 40 years. However, agriculture sector jobs began with 6 million in 1960, which declined continuously till 2020 by 2 million.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response covers all four sectors and identifies the main trends. However, there are some inaccuracies in data reporting. For instance, you state manufacturing rose by 20 million in 1980, which is not supported by the graph, and the description of healthcare growth is slightly confusing. While you highlight the main features, the data interpretation lacks precision in places. To reach a higher band, ensure that the figures cited align exactly with the visual information provided and avoid over-generalising trends that are not clearly supported by the data points.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is logically organised with a clear introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. The use of cohesive devices such as 'In contrast', 'Moreover', and 'However' helps to guide the reader through the information. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the different sectors. The progression of ideas is generally clear, although the transition between the healthcare and agriculture descriptions in the final paragraph feels slightly abrupt. Overall, the structure is coherent and easy to follow throughout the response.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'fluctuated', 'soared', and 'declined continuously'. There are some minor issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'steadily soaring at 16 million followed by next 40 years', which is slightly awkward. While you attempt to use less common vocabulary, the precision is occasionally lacking. To improve, focus on using collocations more naturally and ensuring that your descriptive verbs accurately reflect the movement shown on the graph.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are some grammatical errors, such as the comma splice in '15 million jobs, this figure rose' and the awkward phrasing in the final paragraph regarding the agricultural sector. While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. Increasing the variety of complex structures and ensuring subject-verb agreement and correct punctuation will help improve your accuracy and range.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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