Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-05
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The graph reveal information about the amount of jobs in four sectors Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture and Healthcare of the economy in the US in 6 decades between 1960 and 2020.
In all sectors jobs between these 6 decades show both positive and negative movement.In starting year of 1960 15 millions jobs for Manufacturing 6 millions for Retail and Agriculture and 2 millions jobs for Healthcare was available. Jobs for Manufacturing, Retail and Healthcare was rose moderately from 1960 to 1980.But jobs for Agriculture went down steadily to 3 million in same years. From 1980 to 2020 jobs for Manufacturing dropped significantly to 12.5 millions. In the same years jobs for Agriculture a little bit move down to 2.5 millions form 3 millions.
But jobs for both Retail and Healthcare sharply increase to 16 millions from 1960 to 2020. These jobs are available in same numbers in 2020.
To sum up, It should be noted that at the end jobs for Retail and Healthcare are in high numbers and at same point.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response covers the main features of the graph, identifying the trends for the four sectors. However, the overview is somewhat weak; while it mentions positive and negative movements, it lacks a clear synthesis of the most significant trends, such as the dramatic rise of the service-related sectors versus the decline in manufacturing and agriculture. The data reporting is generally accurate, but there are some inaccuracies in the interpretation of the figures (e.g., stating 15 million for manufacturing in 1960 when the graph shows a different value). The response addresses the task requirements but lacks the precision and analytical depth required for a higher band score.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the progression of ideas. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and repetitive. For instance, the transition 'In the same years' is used multiple times, and the connection between sentences could be smoother. The paragraphing is appropriate, but the overall flow is occasionally interrupted by awkward phrasing. While the information is arranged coherently, the lack of varied linking words and occasional issues with referencing prevent a higher score in this category.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is adequate for the task but remains quite basic. The student relies on simple verbs like 'rose', 'went down', and 'increase'. There is an attempt to use some sector-specific terminology, but the range is limited. Errors in word choice, such as 'amount of jobs' (should be 'number of jobs') and 'a little bit move down', indicate a lack of precision. To improve, the student should incorporate more sophisticated vocabulary related to trends and data description, such as 'fluctuated', 'plummeted', or 'remained stable'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors. Subject-verb agreement is a recurring issue, such as 'The graph reveal' instead of 'reveals' and 'jobs... was rose' instead of 'jobs... rose'. There are also errors with articles and prepositions, such as 'In starting year' and 'in same years'. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to distract the reader and indicate a lack of control over complex structures.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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