Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-05

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Given line graph illustrate number of job in four different sectors like manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare over six decade in the United States.

In the graph we can find tant manufacture jobs were highest around fifteen millions which increase for next two decades, and for next forty years it dropped gradually. In the year 2020 manufacturing units higher around 13millions employees which is lower than 1960. On other hand healthcare employment were around two million in the year 1960, which than increased by around eight times and reach about sixteen millions till year 2020.

While for retail and agriculture starts from the same point, starts with six millions job in the year 1960. Both goes opposite directions where retail move upward while agriculture goes downward. Retail steadily increase and reach around 16 millions workers in the year 2020. While agriculture employment decreased about 50% in first twenty years and for next stays steady and then dropped by around one million and reach 2 millions by the year 2020.

On comparison of all four areas, retail and healthcare employees get hired in increased manner and reach around 16 millions in the year 2020. While manufacturing hiring first increase and dropped, and for agriculture it goes downhill and steady and than goes down.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response covers all four sectors and identifies the main trends, such as the growth in healthcare and retail versus the decline in agriculture. However, the overview is weak; it lacks a clear summary of the most significant trends, such as the convergence of retail and healthcare at the end of the period. Some data points are imprecise or incorrectly stated, such as the claim that manufacturing was 'highest around fifteen millions' in 1960, which misinterprets the graph. The summary is functional but lacks the analytical depth required for a higher band, as it focuses more on listing data points than synthesizing the overall economic shift.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, with each focusing on specific sectors. There is a clear attempt to use cohesive devices like 'On other hand', 'While', and 'In comparison'. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly inaccurate, such as 'In the graph we can find tant' (a typo) and the repetitive use of 'While' to start sentences. The progression of ideas is generally logical, but the referencing is occasionally clunky, which makes the flow feel a bit disjointed at times. Paragraphing is present but could be more effectively used to group the contrasting trends more clearly.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks variety and precision. There is frequent repetition of basic verbs like 'increase', 'dropped', and 'reach'. Some word choices are unnatural, such as 'hired in increased manner' and 'manufacturing units higher'. There are also minor spelling errors like 'tant' instead of 'that' and 'millions' (pluralized incorrectly in some contexts). To improve, you should incorporate more sophisticated synonyms for trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'surged', 'plummeted', or 'remained stable', and ensure that collocations are used correctly to describe economic data.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout. Issues include missing articles ('in the United States'), incorrect verb tenses ('healthcare employment were'), and subject-verb agreement errors ('retail and agriculture starts'). The sentence structure is often repetitive, relying heavily on simple clauses. While the meaning is generally clear, the frequency of these errors requires the reader to focus more than necessary to understand the intended message. More attention to basic grammar rules, particularly pluralization and verb agreement, is needed to reach a higher band.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.