Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-06
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The line chart delineates the information on number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the USA between 1960 and 2020.
Evidently, the trajectories of retail and healthcare sector experienced growth and terminated at the same number of jobs in the last year. Moreover, the number of jobs in manufacturing sector increased initially then declined over the period. However, agriculture sector had the decreasing number of jobs over the whole timeframe.
To be specific, there were least number of jobs in healthcare sector in 1960 with 2.5 million jobs which dramatically increased to nearly 16 million jobs in 2020. Similarly, number of jobs in retail sector started with 6 million increased gradually till 2000 and then slightly rose to end up same as healthcare sector at 16 million. In contrast, the graph of agricultural sector was initially at 6 million jobs plunged to 3 million jobs in 1980 and then declined to 2 million jobs in 2020. Surprisingly, the number of jobs in manufacturing sector increased from 15 million to 20 million in first 20 years then after ratcheted down 12.5 million in 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response effectively identifies the main trends and provides a clear overview of the four sectors. You successfully highlight the key features, such as the growth in healthcare and retail, the decline in agriculture, and the fluctuation in manufacturing. The data is accurately reported, and the comparison between sectors is well-integrated. To reach a higher band, ensure that the overview is more distinct from the body paragraphs and consider adding a more analytical summary of the overall shifts in the US economy during this period, rather than just listing the data points.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is logically organized, with a clear introduction, an overview paragraph, and detailed body paragraphs. The use of cohesive devices such as 'Moreover', 'However', 'To be specific', and 'In contrast' helps guide the reader through the information. However, the flow between sentences could be improved by varying the structure of your cohesive links, as some transitions feel slightly mechanical. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the general trends from the specific data points, which aids readability.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
You demonstrate a sufficient range of vocabulary to convey the information clearly, using terms like 'delineates', 'trajectories', 'ratcheted down', and 'plunged'. While these are effective, there are some minor issues with collocation and word choice, such as 'terminated at the same number' or 'least number of jobs', which sound slightly unnatural. Expanding your range of synonyms for 'increase' and 'decrease' and focusing on more precise collocations would help elevate your score in this criterion.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is always clear, there are several grammatical slips, such as missing articles ('the' agriculture sector, 'the' manufacturing sector) and minor errors in phrasing like 'number of jobs in manufacturing sector increased... in first 20 years'. The control of punctuation is generally good, but the occasional omission of articles and prepositions prevents the writing from being consistently error-free. Focusing on article usage and sentence variety will improve your accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.