Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-06

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line graph illustrates the information about the number of jobs across four different sectors of the economy in the United States between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, healthcare sector showed a consistent upward trend throughout the period. In contrast, manufacturing field remained at the leading position till 2000, which fell to third position by the end of 2020. However, retail industry also showed upward trend which shred the same figure with healthcare sector in 2020. Meanwhile, agriculture sector represented the downward trend.

Regarding manufacturing industry, which started at 15 million jobs in 1960, which increased to a peak of 20 million in 1980. This figure fell to approximately 17 million in 2000, and around 13 million in 2020. Moreover, retail sector rose gradually from almost 6 million in 1960 to 10 million in 1980 in terms of jobs, which further increased 15 million in 2000 and peaked at 16 million in 2020.

On the other hand, agriculture field started at around 6 million jobs in 1960, fell to a low of approximately 3 million in 1980 and remained stable in 2000. This number deceased slightly in 2020, bottomed out at around 2 million. Nevertheless, healthcare industry showed the highest growth throughout the period, which beginned at around 2 million in 1960, rose to 5 million in 1980, and reached around 11 million in 2000. This figure increased to over 16 million in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

You have successfully identified the main trends and provided a clear overview of the data. You covered all four sectors and made relevant comparisons, such as noting the shift in the manufacturing sector's position and the convergence of the healthcare and retail sectors by 2020. The data is accurately reported, and the key features are highlighted effectively. To reach a higher band, ensure that your overview is even more distinct from the body paragraphs and perhaps synthesize the data more fluidly by grouping sectors with similar trends (e.g., the growth sectors vs. the declining sector) rather than describing each sector in isolation.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The response is logically organized, with a clear introduction, overview, and body paragraphs dedicated to specific sectors. You use a range of cohesive devices such as 'In contrast', 'However', 'Meanwhile', and 'On the other hand' to guide the reader. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the different trends. While the flow is generally good, some transitions between sentences feel slightly mechanical. To improve, try to vary your linking phrases further and ensure that the progression of ideas within paragraphs remains smooth, particularly when moving between the specific data points of different sectors.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate a sufficient range of vocabulary to describe trends, such as 'consistent upward trend', 'peaked', 'bottomed out', and 'remained stable'. There are some minor inaccuracies, such as 'shred the same figure' (should be 'shared') and 'beginned' (which is grammatically incorrect). While you use some good topic-specific vocabulary, the range is somewhat limited. To achieve a higher score, incorporate more sophisticated collocations and avoid repetitive phrasing. For example, instead of repeating 'number of jobs' or 'figure', use synonyms like 'employment levels', 'workforce statistics', or 'proportions'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, which is appropriate for this task. However, there are several grammatical errors that occur throughout the text, such as 'healthcare sector showed' (missing an article: 'the healthcare sector'), 'which beginned' (incorrect verb form), and 'which increased 15 million' (missing a preposition: 'increased to 15 million'). These errors are frequent enough to be noticeable but do not impede the overall communication of the data. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement, correct article usage, and consistent verb tense application when describing historical data.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.