Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-07

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates the number of jobs in four sector of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, Manufacturing had the most jobs in 1960, figure dropping significantly in the following years, then came third in 2020. Retail and healthcare jobs experienced the most rapid growth, reaching at the top in 2020. Agriculture related jobs continued declining, reaching the lowest figure in 2020.

In 1960, manufacturing jobs were most common with 15 millions in number. It is followed by retail and agriculture jobs with 6 millions jobs, while the least jobs were for healthcare sector, only 3 millions. Within 2 decades, manufacturing and retail sectors had an addition of 5 million more jobs, reached 20 millions and 10 millions respectively. Healthcare jobs significantly rose to 5 millions, while agriculture sharply dropped to 3 millions.

From 1980 to 2020, manufacturing sector faced sharp decline from 20 millions to 13 millions in 2020. On the other hand, retail and healthcare jobs saw relatively increase, both reaching 16 million by the end. Conversely, agriculture jobs went down to 2 million at the end.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response covers all parts of the task by identifying the main trends and making relevant comparisons. You successfully highlighted the contrasting trajectories of the four sectors, such as the decline in manufacturing and agriculture versus the growth in retail and healthcare. However, the data reporting is occasionally inaccurate. For instance, you stated manufacturing had 15 million jobs in 1960, but the graph indicates a lower figure, and your description of the 1980-2020 period contains inconsistencies regarding the final figures. To reach a higher band, ensure that data points are extracted with greater precision and that the overview clearly synthesizes the most significant trends without relying on minor inaccuracies.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs that group information by time periods. The progression of ideas is generally easy to follow. You use some cohesive devices like 'In 1960', 'Within 2 decades', and 'Conversely' to link your points. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical, and the referencing is occasionally slightly unclear. For example, the transition between the overview and the first body paragraph could be smoother. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that each paragraph has a clear thematic focus would help elevate the coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'illustrates', 'significantly', 'rapid growth', and 'declining'. There are some minor errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'reaching at the top' (should be 'reaching the top') and 'relatively increase' (should be 'a relative increase'). While you successfully use sector-specific terminology, the range is somewhat limited, and there is a tendency to repeat basic structures. To improve, try to incorporate more sophisticated synonyms for 'increase' and 'decrease' and ensure that your collocations are natural and precise.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are several grammatical errors throughout the text. Examples include 'four sector' (should be 'four sectors'), '15 millions' (should be '15 million'), and 'the least jobs were for healthcare sector' (missing an article). Additionally, there are issues with subject-verb agreement and preposition usage. While these errors do not significantly impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. Focusing on article usage, pluralization, and consistent verb tense application will help improve your accuracy.

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