Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-07
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The given line chart illustrates the number of jobs available in four different sectors of the economy in the United States of America from 1960 to 2020.
Overall, there are 4 different job sectors given; manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare. The number of jobs in retail and healthcare industries increased with time while manufacturing and agricultural jobs got scarcer.
In 1960, there were 15 million jobs available in manufacturing industry which experienced an increase by 5 million jobs in the following given year. Then it fell down to around 17 million jobs in 2000 before further decreasing below 15 million jobs in 2020. Retail industry had just little above 5 million jobs available in 1960 and increased over time, it produced 10 million jobs in 1980, 15 million jobs in 2000 and little above 15 million jobs by 2020.
The agricultural industry had approximately 6 million jobs in 1960 which went down in the next 20 years to nearly 3 million jobs and remained stable for the next 20 years and then in 2020 there was slight decrease in job availability. The jobs in healthcare industries increased after every 20 years and by the year 2020 there were almost 16 million jobs were introduced.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers all four sectors and provides a clear overview of the trends. However, the data reporting is inconsistent. For instance, the description of manufacturing is confusing, stating it reached 15 million in 1960 and then increased by 5 million in the 'following given year,' which is not supported by the graph. Additionally, the analysis of the agricultural sector is slightly inaccurate regarding the timeline of the decline. While the main features are identified, the lack of precision in data interpretation prevents a higher score. To improve, ensure that the data points cited align strictly with the visual information provided.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is logically organized into an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. The progression of ideas is generally clear, moving from the overview to specific sector trends. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and repetitive (e.g., 'In 1960,' 'The agricultural industry,' 'The jobs in'). There is a need for more varied linking words to connect sentences and clauses more fluidly. Paragraphing is used appropriately, but the internal cohesion within the body paragraphs could be strengthened by using more sophisticated transition signals to show contrast or sequence.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is adequate for the task, allowing the writer to describe trends (e.g., 'increased,' 'remained stable,' 'slight decrease'). However, the range is somewhat limited and repetitive. Phrases like 'got scarcer' are informal and not ideal for an academic report. There are also minor errors in word choice, such as 'there were almost 16 million jobs were introduced,' which is grammatically awkward and lexically imprecise. To reach a higher band, the student should incorporate more precise academic vocabulary related to data trends and avoid informal phrasing.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are several grammatical errors that occur throughout the text. For example, 'there were almost 16 million jobs were introduced' contains a double verb structure, and 'had just little above' is missing an article. Additionally, there are issues with tense consistency and preposition usage. While these errors do not impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and article usage would significantly improve the accuracy of the writing.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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