Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-07

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph depicts the amount of jobs among four sectors that contribute towards the economy of US between 1960 to 2020.

Overall, agriculture sector declined steadily causing less jobs in the market, although the other sectors continued to play their part contributing towards the economy of the country.

Manufacturing started with the highest employment rate initially, steadily reaching the zenith at 1980, soon later causing a drastic fall in the later years. Retail and Agriculture started at similar figures in 1960, but the shift surged for retail employees as the years passed on, with agriculture having least jobs.

Although, healthcare provided least number of opportunities during 1960, however, it is the highest recruiting sector alongside retail during 2020. Manufacturing, Retail and Healthcare provide almost 10 to 30 million jobs in the market, with retail and healthcare contributing approximate 15 millions each and manufacturing just above 10 million jobs. Agriculture had a steady downward trend providing just around a couple of million jobs.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response covers all four sectors and identifies the main trends, such as the decline in agriculture and the rise in healthcare and retail. However, the analysis is somewhat inconsistent. For instance, the statement that healthcare provided the 'least number of opportunities' in 1960 is inaccurate based on the graph, which shows agriculture starting at a higher point. Additionally, the description of the 2020 figures is slightly vague, and the comparison between sectors could be more precise. While the main features are highlighted, the lack of precision in data interpretation prevents a higher band score.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is logically organized into an introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Overall', 'Although', and 'however', though some transitions feel slightly mechanical or forced. The paragraphing is appropriate, and there is a clear progression of ideas from the general trends to specific sector details. However, the use of 'Although' followed by 'however' in the same sentence is redundant and impacts the flow. Improving the variety and naturalness of linking phrases would enhance the coherence of the response.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The range of vocabulary is adequate for the task, with attempts to use descriptive terms like 'zenith', 'drastic fall', and 'surged'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'amount of jobs' (should be 'number of jobs') and 'shift surged for retail' (which is slightly awkward). The term 'approximate' is used incorrectly as an adverb. While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey the main points, it lacks the precision and flexibility required for a higher band score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'contribute towards the economy of US' (missing article), 'at 1980' (should be 'in 1980'), and 'providing just around a couple of million jobs'. The punctuation is generally functional, but the sentence structure occasionally feels repetitive. While these errors do not impede communication, they are frequent enough to suggest that control over complex structures is not yet consistent.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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