Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-07

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Task-1

The provided line graph, illustrate number of jobs in four sector of the economy namely manufacturing, retail, agriculture, healthcare in the united States from year 1960 to 2020. Data is compiled in million.

overall, it can be clearly seen that maximum number of jobs in manufacturing sector whereas, minimum job opportunity in agriculture sector from year 1960 to 2020.

In case of agriculture sector, in year 1960 number of jobs are more than 5 million and then fall to about 3 million and in year 1980 also remain unchanged in year 2000 and fall to just above 0 million in the ending. whereas, retail sector also started with more than 5 million in year 1960 after that show upward trend to 10 and 15 million in year 1980 and 2000. In year 2020. This sector experience small amount of growth in year

200 which was just above 15 million.

In case of manufacturing sector, 15 million jobs opportunity in year 1960 and then jobs opportunity skyrocketed to exactly 20 million in year 1980 After that this sector face downward trend and job opportunity falls to less than 15 million in year 2020. But healthcare sector has minimum job opportunity which was less than 5 millions in year 1960. In year 1980 job opportunities increased to exactly 5 million. in year 1980 after there was gradual surge in year 2000 and 2020 and reached to more than 15 million.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response covers all four sectors and identifies key trends. However, there are significant inaccuracies in data reporting. For example, you state the manufacturing sector reached 20 million in 1980, but the graph shows it peaking closer to 25 million. Additionally, you claim the healthcare sector had the minimum number of jobs in 1960, yet the graph clearly shows agriculture starting at a higher point than healthcare. The overview is present but lacks precision, and some data points are misread or described vaguely (e.g., 'just above 0 million'). To improve, ensure you carefully cross-reference the axes with the data points to avoid factual errors.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate. Phrases like 'In case of' are overused and repetitive. There are also issues with referencing; for instance, the transition 'in year 1980 after there was' is disjointed and confusing. While there is a logical progression from the overview to the body paragraphs, the lack of smooth transitions between sentences makes the flow feel somewhat stilted. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring clear pronoun usage would enhance the overall coherence.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it is limited and repetitive. You frequently use basic phrases like 'number of jobs', 'show upward trend', and 'job opportunity'. There are also some errors in word formation and collocation, such as 'illustrate number of jobs' (should be 'illustrates the number of jobs') and 'small amount of growth'. To reach a higher band, you should aim to incorporate more precise academic vocabulary related to trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'peaked', 'surpassed', or 'remained stagnant', and ensure correct article usage when referring to specific sectors.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Common issues include missing articles (e.g., 'in year 1960' instead of 'in the year 1960'), subject-verb agreement errors (e.g., 'number of jobs are'), and tense inconsistencies. For example, you switch between present and past tenses when describing historical data. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with some sentences lacking proper capitalization or ending abruptly. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for subject-verb agreement would significantly improve the accuracy of your writing.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.