Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-08
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The graph illustrates information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Overall, the manufacturing sector recorded the highest number of jobs, whereas the agriculture sector recorded the lowest number of jobs. The retail and the healthcare sector was gradually increased the jobs over the period.
The manufacturing sector was recorded 15 million jobs in 1960, before reaching peak of 20 million in 1980. Furthermore this figure fell to 17 million in 2000, before mark lowest of 13 million jobs in 2020. The agriculture sector stood at 6 million jobs in 1960, then gradually fell to 3 million in 1980 and 2000, before reaching lowest figure of 2 million in 2020, among all sectors.
The retail sector recorded 6 milion jobs in 1960, which gradually increased from 10 million to 16 million between 1980 and 2020. The healthcare sector stood at 3 million jobs in 1960, which further rose at 5 million in 1980 and then 11 million in 2000, before reaching the highest number of 16 million in 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5
The response covers all parts of the task by identifying the main trends and providing relevant data points for all four sectors. The overview is clear and highlights the key differences between the sectors. However, the analysis could be improved by making more direct comparisons between the sectors rather than just listing data chronologically. For instance, noting that healthcare overtook manufacturing by 2020 would have strengthened the response. The data is generally accurate, though the phrasing 'mark lowest' is slightly imprecise. Overall, the response effectively summarizes the information provided in the graph.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The response is logically organized, with a clear introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs that group the sectors effectively. Cohesive devices such as 'before reaching', 'furthermore', and 'which' are used to link ideas. However, some transitions are slightly mechanical, and the paragraphing could be more balanced. The use of referencing is generally clear, though some sentences feel slightly disjointed due to repetitive sentence structures. Overall, the flow of information is easy to follow, and the progression of ideas is logical throughout the report.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The range of vocabulary is adequate for the task, with terms like 'manufacturing sector', 'economy', and 'gradually increased' used correctly. There are some minor errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'before mark lowest' instead of 'before reaching its lowest point' and 'rose at 5 million' instead of 'rose to 5 million'. While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey the meaning clearly, it lacks the sophistication and precision required for a higher band. Spelling is generally accurate, with the exception of 'milon'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors that occur throughout the text, such as 'The retail and the healthcare sector was gradually increased' (subject-verb agreement and passive voice error) and 'The manufacturing sector was recorded 15 million jobs' (incorrect passive construction). While these errors do not impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. The student demonstrates an attempt at complex structures, but control over these is inconsistent.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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