Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-08

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

This chart shows the trend of jobs in the four sectors of US in the interval [redacted phone]

First we discuss about the manufacturing sector:

The graph show us that the economy increase in between 1960 and 1980 and then the economy gradually decrease between the 1980 and 2000 and follow the downward trend means in the first 20 years the manufacturing rate is high people buy more things in these years and later that the trend change and rate of manufacturing decrease.

The second one is about the trend of retail:

The retail means the vendors that buy the things from the manufacturing organizations at bulk and sell them to the whole sealer and shop keepers. Here the graph shows that they buy the things more in the year between 1960 an d2000 then the trend is stable in 2000 and 2020.

The third one is abut the agriculture:

In the era between 1960 and 1980 the trend is in the downward means many people left the agriculture and do something else due to any issue might be some financial or they getting another job rather then the agriculture then the graph maintain the position on between the 1980 and 2000 then there is again a slight downfall in the sector of agriculture.

The last one is about the health care:

health care means the people are conscious about their health. According to the graph people are taking care of themselves very actively and it increase between 1960 to 2000 and then the graph maintain its position and get stable.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0

The response fails to provide a clear overview of the main trends, which is a requirement for Task 1. Instead of summarizing the data, the response focuses on providing personal explanations for the trends (e.g., 'people buy more things in these years'), which is not supported by the graph and is irrelevant to the task. The description of the data is inaccurate and lacks specific figures or comparisons between the sectors. The response reads more like a subjective commentary than an objective report of the provided data.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The response is organized into paragraphs, but the structure is repetitive and mechanical. Each paragraph begins with a label ('First we discuss...', 'The second one is about...'), which is not appropriate for an academic report. There is a lack of cohesive devices to link ideas within or between sentences. The progression of information is disjointed, and the referencing is often unclear, making the text difficult to follow as a cohesive piece of writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is very limited and often inaccurate. The student uses informal and imprecise language, such as 'do something else' and 'get stable'. There are several instances of word-choice errors, such as 'whole sealer' (wholesaler) and 'downward means'. The range of vocabulary is insufficient to describe trends or data points effectively, relying on basic, repetitive phrasing throughout the response.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response contains frequent grammatical errors that impede communication. There are issues with subject-verb agreement ('The graph show us'), tense consistency, and sentence structure. Many sentences are run-on or fragmented, and punctuation is often missing or incorrect. The range of structures is very limited, consisting mostly of simple sentences with errors in basic syntax. These frequent errors make the text difficult to read and understand.

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