Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-08
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
this figures shows about the information different sectors of job of us economy by the start of 1960 and the end of 2020 in y axis jobs are shown in number of millions and x axis is labeled by years jobs in manufacturing is maintaining an all time high but it decrease from 1980 and goes down gradually 5 million jobs was held for agriculture but it has a slight decrease and continues its down trend no fluctuation was seemed by the end of 2020 while retailers and healthcare economy's has seemed a great competition both of these economy's rose until the manufacturing goes down from both but still manufacturing has a good job opportunities between 15-10 million while the retailer and healthcare economy's just hit the 15 million job according to the figure it is clear that these both economy's increased and no fall has been seen by the end of 2020
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response attempts to cover the main features of the graph, but the analysis is often inaccurate and lacks clarity. For instance, the description of manufacturing trends is confusing, and the claim that retailers and healthcare sectors showed 'great competition' is vague. The response fails to provide a clear overview or highlight the most significant trends effectively. Data points are mentioned, but the lack of precise figures and the misinterpretation of the trends mean that the information is not fully developed. To improve, you should focus on identifying the starting and ending points for each sector and clearly contrasting the growth or decline of these categories.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The response lacks paragraphing, which makes it difficult to follow. There is a lack of cohesive devices to link ideas; sentences are often strung together without logical transitions. For example, the transition between discussing manufacturing and the other sectors is abrupt. The referencing is also unclear, as the text frequently uses 'these both economy's' without clearly defining which sectors are being compared. To improve, you should organize your report into clear paragraphs: an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs focusing on specific trends. Use linking words like 'whereas', 'in contrast', and 'subsequently' to improve the flow.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is limited and repetitive. There are frequent errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'this figures shows' instead of 'this figure shows' and 'retailer and healthcare economy's' instead of 'retail and healthcare sectors'. The use of 'economy's' is incorrect throughout the text. While the student attempts to use some descriptive language, the lack of precision hinders the clarity of the report. To reach a higher band, you should learn the correct terminology for describing trends, such as 'fluctuate', 'decline', 'remain stable', and 'surpass', and ensure you use the correct noun forms for economic sectors.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. There are consistent issues with subject-verb agreement, such as 'this figures shows' and '5 million jobs was held'. Punctuation is almost entirely absent, making the text a run-on sequence of clauses. The sentence structures are mostly simple, and attempts at complex sentences are often faulty or lack necessary conjunctions. To improve, focus on basic sentence construction, ensuring that subjects and verbs agree, and use periods to separate distinct ideas. Practicing the use of articles and pluralization will also significantly improve the accuracy of your writing.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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