Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-09

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

THE PROVIDED LINE GRAPH DEPICTS THE DETAILS ABOUT THE NUMBER OF EMPLOYMENTS IN FOUR DIFFERENT SECTOR IN THE US BETWEEN 1960 AND 2020. JOBS ARE IN MILLIONS.

OVERALL, MANUFACTURING SECTOR STARTED WITH THE HIGHEST PROPORTION, RETAIL AND HEALTHCARE OVERTOOK IT AND BECAME THE LARGEST JOB HOLDERS WITH SAME PROPORTION BY THE END OF THE PERIOD. INITIALLY, HEALTHCARE SECTOR HAD THE LEAST FIGURES, WHILE AGRICULTURE SECTOR BECAME THE LEAST BY 2020.

TO BEGIN WITH, HAVING STARTED AT 15 MILLIONS IN 1960, MANUFACTURING DEPARTMENT, ROSE TO 20 MILLIONS AFTER 2 DECADES, BEFORE RECORDING A SLIGHT DECLINE OF APPROXIMATELY 17 MILLIONS BY 2000 AND FINISHED AT AROUND 14 MILLIONS IN 2020. WHEREAS, HEALTHCARE STOOD AT 3 MILLIONS, BEFORE RISING TO 10 MILLIONS FROM 5 MILLIONS AND ENDED UP AT OVER 15 MILLIONS IN THE SAME TIMEFRAME.

IN 1960, AGRICULTURA SECTOR AND RETAIL SECTOR WAS AT ALMOST 6 MILLIONS JOBS. WHILE RETAIL SHOWED AN UPWARD TREND OF 4 MILLIONS IN 1980, AGRICULTURAL RECORDED A DOWNWARD TREND WITH DECREASE OF 2 MILLIONS JOBS. BY 2000, RETAIL INCREASED TO 15 MILLIONS BEFORE REACHING TO ABOVE 15 MILLIONS IN THE FINAL YEAR, IN CONTRAST, AGRICULTURE REMAINED UNCHANGED BEFORE FELLING TO ALMOST 2 MILLION IN 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response covers all key features of the graph, including the trends for all four sectors. You successfully identified the starting and ending points and noted the significant shifts, such as the manufacturing sector's decline and the rise of healthcare and retail. However, the overview is slightly cluttered; it would be more effective to focus on the most significant trends rather than listing every sector. The data is generally accurate, though the phrasing 'same proportion' is slightly imprecise given the graph's visual representation. Overall, the response provides a clear summary of the main trends as required by the task.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is logically organized into paragraphs, with a clear introduction, overview, and body paragraphs. You use cohesive devices such as 'whereas', 'in contrast', and 'to begin with' to link ideas. However, some transitions feel a bit mechanical, and the flow between sentences could be smoother. For example, the transition between the description of the manufacturing sector and the healthcare sector in the third paragraph is slightly abrupt. Additionally, the use of referencing could be improved to avoid repetitive sentence structures. Overall, the information is presented in a coherent manner that is easy to follow.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'proportion', 'upward trend', and 'downward trend'. There are some minor errors in word choice and spelling, such as 'AGRICULTURA' and 'FELLING' (instead of 'falling'). While you attempt to use some specific terminology related to the graph, the range is somewhat limited and repetitive. To reach a higher band, try to incorporate more precise verbs and nouns to describe changes, such as 'fluctuated', 'surpassed', or 'remained stagnant'. The errors present do not impede communication, but they do limit the precision of your report.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement issues ('AGRICULTURA SECTOR AND RETAIL SECTOR WAS') and incorrect preposition usage ('at 15 millions'). Additionally, there are some awkward phrasings like 'became the largest job holders with same proportion'. While these errors are noticeable, they rarely impede the reader's understanding of the data. To improve, focus on ensuring subject-verb agreement and refining the use of articles and prepositions. Increasing the variety of complex sentence structures would also help in achieving a higher band score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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