Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-09

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

THE LINE GRAPH UNDER GIVES DATA OF THE TOTAL NUMBER OF EMPLOYMENT IN FOUR INDUSTRIES OF THE ECNOMIC SYSTEM IN THE US FROM 1960 TO 2020. HEALTHCARE SECTORS JOBS HIGHLY GROWING FROM 1960 ON THE OTHER SIDE AGRICULTURE JOBS DECREASING FROM 1960.

IN THE YEAR 1960 MANUFACTURING INDUSTRIES JOBS IS 15 MILLION, YEAR 1980 GROWEN BY 5 MILLION, YEAR 2000 IT DECREASED BY 3 TO 4 MILLION SOMETHING 16 MILLON AND LASTLY IN YEAR 2020 IT MORE DECREASED 3 TO 4 MILLION AND IT IS DONE ABOUT 12 TO 13 MILLION. RETAIL SECTOR IN YEAR 1960 JOBS REQUIMENTS IS ABOUT 6 MILLION, IN 1980 IT IS INCREASED AND DONE 10 MILLION, IN YEAR 2000 JOBS GROWN 5 MILLION AND IN YEAR 2020 IT IS GROWN 1 TO 2 MILLION.

IN AGRICULTURE SECTOR JOBS HIGHEST BY 6 TO 7 MILLION IN YEAR 1960 AND IT STARTED TO BECOME DECREASE IN YEAR 1980 IT IS ABOUT 3 MILLION AND YEAR 2000 IT IS SAME AS YEAR 1980 AND IN YEAR 2020 IT DECREASE NEARLY BY 1 MILLION. HEALTHCARE SECTOR IS LOWER JOBS IN 1960 AND IT IS ABOUT 3 MILLION, IN YEAR 1980 IT INCREASE AND DONE 5 MILLION, YEAR 2000 IT INCREASED 6 MILLION THEN 1980 AND YEAR 2000 IT IS ABOUT 16 MILLION.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses the task by identifying the four sectors and describing trends over the period. However, the report lacks a clear overview of the main trends, which is a requirement for Band 6+. The data reporting is often inaccurate or confusing, such as the description of the healthcare sector, where the figures provided (e.g., '16 million' for the year 2000) do not clearly align with standard interpretations of such graphs. The response focuses heavily on listing individual data points rather than synthesizing the information to highlight key comparisons or significant shifts, which limits the development of the response.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The response is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is very limited and often mechanical. There is a lack of linking words to connect ideas within sentences or between paragraphs, making the flow feel disjointed. The referencing is sometimes unclear, and the progression of information is repetitive rather than logical. To improve, you should use a wider variety of linking phrases such as 'in contrast,' 'subsequently,' or 'meanwhile' to guide the reader through the data comparisons.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is quite limited and repetitive, relying heavily on basic verbs like 'grow,' 'increase,' and 'decrease.' There are also issues with word formation and collocation, such as 'jobs requirements is' and 'it is done about.' The use of 'highly growing' is not natural English. To reach a higher band, you need to use a more varied range of vocabulary to describe trends, such as 'fluctuated,' 'remained stable,' or 'experienced a significant decline,' and ensure that words are used in their correct grammatical form.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5

The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. There are consistent issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'jobs is 15 million'), tense usage (e.g., 'it is increased'), and sentence structure. Many sentences are fragmented or lack proper articles and prepositions. While there is an attempt to use complex ideas, the lack of control over basic grammar prevents the use of a wide range of structures. Focusing on basic sentence construction and ensuring consistent tense usage for historical data is essential for improvement.

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