Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-09

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates the number of works in four areas namely manufacturing, retail , agriculture and healthcare of the economy of America from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, the graph shows an upward trend in the sectors of retails and healthcare while the economy of manufacturing and agriculture sectors has significantly fallen over a period f time.

In 1960, the greatest economies of the US were agriculture and retail that was almost 7 % . However, retail economy significantly rose up to 10% in 1960 and didnot stop here, it speedily increased in 2000 making up 15 percent. It reached to 16 % in 2020 hence secured the highest position in the all economies. On the other hand ,the economy of retail also show a consistent upward trend by its end making up 17 % of the total economy.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which significantly impacts the task achievement score. Furthermore, the content is incomplete; while it attempts to describe the trends, it misses data for two of the four sectors (manufacturing and agriculture) and contains factual inaccuracies regarding the data points provided. The overview is present but lacks the necessary detail to fully capture the main features of the graph. To improve, ensure all categories are addressed and that the data reported aligns accurately with the visual information provided in the prompt.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into an introduction, an overview, and one body paragraph. However, the progression of ideas is hindered by the lack of a second body paragraph to cover the remaining sectors. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'However' and 'On the other hand', but they are sometimes used incorrectly or to connect contradictory information. The paragraphing is insufficient for a report of this nature, and the logical flow is disrupted by the incomplete analysis of the data. Better use of linking words and a more structured approach to grouping data would improve the coherence.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is somewhat limited and repetitive. There are several instances of imprecise word choice, such as 'number of works' instead of 'number of jobs' and 'economies' used to refer to employment sectors. The phrasing 'did not stop here' is too informal for an Academic Task 1 report. While the student attempts to use some descriptive language like 'speedily increased' and 'upward trend', the overall range is narrow. To reach a higher band, focus on using more precise terminology related to data description, such as 'fluctuated', 'remained stable', or 'experienced a decline'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response contains a mix of simple and some attempted complex structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'retail , agriculture' (punctuation error), 'retail economy significantly rose up to 10% in 1960' (tense and preposition usage), and 'the economy of manufacturing and agriculture sectors has significantly fallen over a period f time' (spelling and article usage). Subject-verb agreement and prepositional phrases need more attention. While the meaning is generally understandable, the frequency of errors prevents the writing from reaching a higher band score.

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