Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-09

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The given line graph provides information about figure of employment in four different sectors of united state economy from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, Retail and healthcare fields improved their jobs opportunities throughout the period. The manufacturing sector considered high number of jobs in first 20 years in next period it showed gradually declined in job figures while, agriculture followed downward trend in all years.

To begin, in 1960 manufacturing companies have larger employers 15 millions this figure increased steadily in 1980 and reached to 20 millions. The retail/ agriculture sectors have same number of jobs in beginning approximately 6 millions and in next 20 years retail expanded their employment capacity touched the 10 millions figure while agriculture field moderately go down in generating jobs.

The manufacturing sector jobs significantly decreased from 1980 to onwards in 2020 less then 15 millions jobs were available in this field. The retail/healthcare sectors climbed up in introducing job vacancies in end of periods both reached approximately 16 millions. While agriculture field stabled there figure in 2000 and in 2020 it again showed slight drop almost 2.5 millions jobs left in end of time.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

You have successfully identified the main trends and provided a clear overview of the data. You covered all four sectors and made relevant comparisons between them, such as noting the contrasting trends between manufacturing and the retail/healthcare sectors. However, some of your data reporting is slightly imprecise; for instance, stating that manufacturing reached 20 million in 1980 is accurate, but your description of the retail/healthcare sectors climbing to 16 million in 2020 could be more clearly linked to the specific visual data points. To reach a higher band, ensure that all figures are explicitly supported by the graph and avoid vague phrasing like 'in end of periods'.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The response is logically organized into an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. You use some cohesive devices such as 'To begin', 'while', and 'in addition', which help the flow of information. However, the transition between ideas is sometimes mechanical, and there are instances where the referencing is slightly unclear, such as 'in next period it showed gradually declined'. The paragraphing is appropriate, but the internal cohesion within paragraphs could be improved by using a wider variety of linking words to connect the trends more fluidly rather than listing them.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You have an adequate range of vocabulary to convey the trends, using terms like 'steadily', 'expanded', 'capacity', and 'downward trend'. However, there are several instances of awkward word choice and collocation errors, such as 'considered high number of jobs', 'stabled there figure', and 'less then' (should be 'less than'). These errors do not impede communication, but they do limit the precision of your report. To improve, focus on using more sophisticated collocations related to data trends and ensure correct spelling of basic comparative terms.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt to use complex sentences, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with verb tenses ('manufacturing companies have larger employers'), articles ('in united state economy'), and prepositions ('in end of time'). Some sentences are slightly fragmented or lack necessary articles, which affects the overall accuracy. While these errors rarely prevent the reader from understanding your meaning, they are frequent enough to keep the score in the 6.0 range. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and article usage will significantly improve your accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.