Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-09
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The given line bar illustrates the information of statistics of employments in four major sectors of economy in the US in 60 years of period from 1960 to 2020.
Overall, it can be clearly seen that manufacturing and health care industries shows reduction in placements, while retail and agriculture provide opportunities for job positions with the years passes.
Apparently, the manufacturing had highest number of jobs in 1960 with 15 million and also increased to 20 million in next 20 yeas, however, it showed sudden fall through all next years and remained with only 12.5 millions of placements in 2020. On contrary, agriculture had not showed increase in between it constantly fell over the years from 5.5 million to 3 million.
On the opposite, retail and agriculture both were continuedly increased from first given year to last one and respectively offered same the highest job placements by 15 million of jobs.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response attempts to summarize the main features of the graph, but there are significant inaccuracies in the data reporting. For instance, you state that agriculture 'constantly fell' and that retail and agriculture 'both were continuedly increased', which contradicts the visual data provided in the prompt. Furthermore, the final paragraph contains a factual error regarding the sectors being discussed. While you identify the main trends, the misinterpretation of the data prevents a clear and accurate overview. To improve, ensure you carefully cross-reference your written summary with the actual figures on the axes to avoid reporting incorrect information.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate. Phrases like 'On contrary' and 'On the opposite' are used incorrectly or awkwardly. The progression of ideas is sometimes confusing due to the factual errors mentioned in the task achievement section. While there is an attempt to use linking words, the lack of precision in these transitions makes the flow of the argument feel disjointed. Improving the variety and accuracy of your linking phrases will help create a more professional and logical flow.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary range is limited and repetitive. You rely on basic terms like 'increased', 'fell', and 'number of jobs'. There are also issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'statistics of employments' (employment statistics) and 'with the years passes' (as the years passed). Some phrases are non-idiomatic, which hinders the clarity of your report. To reach a higher band, focus on using more precise terminology related to data description, such as 'fluctuated', 'experienced a downward trend', or 'reached a peak', and ensure your collocations are natural.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. Examples include 'manufacturing and health care industries shows reduction' (subject-verb agreement error), 'in next 20 yeas' (missing article and spelling error), and 'agriculture had not showed increase' (incorrect verb tense). You rely mostly on simple sentence structures, and attempts at more complex sentences often contain errors. To improve, focus on mastering basic subject-verb agreement, correct article usage, and consistent verb tenses when describing past trends. Proofreading for these common errors is essential for higher accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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