Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-09

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The given line graph illustrates about the jobs in different categories of the economy in the US from 1960 to 2020. A cursory glance at a graph shows that the maximum opportunities for jobs in the healthcare sector increased in the US from the mentioned years.

In 1960, 15 million jobs were occured in the field of manufacturing and approximately 5.25 million in agriculture same as in retail market . The least opportunities of work in healthcare,.25 million . After twenty years, the demand of jobs were higher in manufacturing stood 20 million then it fell down drastically at 12 million in the year 2020.In the sector of retail, growth of work increased till 2000 at 15 million and remained constant at 16 million. wherever in the agriculture ,number of jobs were dropped in 1980, stood constant till 2000 0.25 million then slightly dip in 2020.

Overall , it is crystal clear that the highest proportion of workforce in healthcare ,it contributed to increase the economy of the

US .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response covers the main features of the graph, but the presentation of data is inconsistent and contains inaccuracies. For instance, the claim that healthcare jobs were the highest is not supported by the data provided in the text, and the description of the agriculture sector is confusing. While the overview attempts to highlight a trend, it lacks clarity and precision. The response addresses the task requirements but fails to provide a clear, accurate summary of the trends, leading to an under-developed analysis of the data.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, but the logical flow is frequently interrupted by awkward phrasing and poor sentence structure. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'In 1960' and 'After twenty years', but they are often mechanical or misused, such as the abrupt transition 'wherever in the agriculture'. The referencing is sometimes unclear, making it difficult for the reader to follow the progression of the data. Paragraphing is present but the internal structure of the paragraphs lacks cohesion.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is limited and often repetitive. There are several instances of word-choice errors, such as 'jobs were occured' instead of 'jobs were created' or 'existed', and 'slightly dip' instead of 'a slight dip'. The range of vocabulary is insufficient to convey the trends with precision. While the meaning is generally understandable, the lack of variety and the frequent errors in collocation and word form prevent a higher score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response relies on a mix of simple and some attempted complex structures, but these are frequently marred by grammatical errors. There are issues with subject-verb agreement ('the demand of jobs were higher'), incorrect verb forms ('jobs were occured'), and punctuation errors, such as the misplaced comma and period in 'healthcare,.25 million'. These errors are frequent and occasionally impede the reader's understanding of the data points being presented.

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