Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-09
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The line graph illustrates details about the number of jobs in four different sectors of the economy in the US from 1960 to 2020.
Overall, at the beginning of the period, manufacturing sector dominated the US economy. Whereas, at the end, the retail and healthcare became the most popular job in US with a rapidly rose with a time period. In constant, Agriculture was the only sector that decline slightly from starting to ending.
In 1960, Manufacturing industry was the ranked first with 15 millions job and it became reached at peaked in 1080 with a 20 millions job than all of the sectors.However, it started to decline slightly and recorded approximately 12 millions job in the US at the of the period. In contract, Healthcare sector is the least m
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.5
The response is incomplete, ending abruptly mid-sentence, which prevents a full summary of the data. While you identified the main trends for manufacturing and agriculture, the failure to complete the report and the under-length nature of the response significantly impact the score. You attempted to select main features, but the lack of a complete overview and the omission of data for the final two sectors mean the task is only partially addressed. To improve, ensure you complete the analysis of all four sectors and provide a clear, concise overview that covers the entire period. The word count is below the 150-word minimum, which is a significant constraint on your ability to demonstrate full task achievement.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is organised into paragraphs, but the abrupt ending disrupts the logical flow. You used some cohesive devices such as 'Overall', 'In constant' (likely meant 'In contrast'), and 'However', but these are sometimes used incorrectly or with mechanical errors. The progression of ideas is hindered by the incomplete nature of the final paragraph. To improve, ensure that each paragraph has a clear focus and that you use linking words more accurately to connect your ideas. The lack of a concluding summary or a fully developed final paragraph makes the overall structure feel unfinished and disjointed.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
Your vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but there are frequent errors in word choice and collocation. For example, you used 'popular job' instead of 'popular sector' and '1080' instead of '1980'. Phrases like 'at the of the period' are incomplete and unclear. You have attempted to use some topic-specific vocabulary like 'manufacturing sector' and 'economy', but the range is limited and the errors occasionally impede the reader's understanding. Focus on using precise terminology for trends and ensuring that your word choices are grammatically correct within the context of the sentence.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including issues with articles ('the manufacturing sector'), pluralisation ('15 millions job'), and verb tense/form ('it became reached at peaked'). The sentence structures are relatively simple, and the errors in basic grammar and punctuation are noticeable. The incomplete final sentence also demonstrates a lack of control over sentence structure. To improve, focus on basic subject-verb agreement, correct article usage, and ensuring that your sentences are complete and grammatically sound. Proofreading for common errors like 'millions job' (should be 'million jobs') will significantly improve your accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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