Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-09
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The linear representation depicts the information about jobs in four different sectors of the economy in the country US between the year 1960 and 2020. the data is calibrated in percentage.
Overall, the starting point of job in manufacturing sector was higher in 1960 followed upward trend. Moreover the least vacancy was in the healthcare sector. However the healthcare sector showed inclination in the graph, and goes upward in 1980.
Broadly, it can be seen that the manufacturing sector showed upward trend whereas healthcare sector showed downward trend.
By scrutinising, retail showed upward trend till 2000 followed straight. Healthcare showed inclination from 3 to 5 between 1960 to 1980 followed inclination till 2020.
Moving towards the rest of the data the agriculture sector decrease from 7 to 4 in 1980 and then remain same allover the season till 2020. furthermore the manufacturing sector showed increment in 1980 but after 1980 the graph goes downward till 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response attempts to cover the four sectors, but the analysis is inconsistent and contains factual inaccuracies. For instance, you state the manufacturing sector showed an 'upward trend' overall, whereas the graph shows a significant decline from 1960 to 2020. Additionally, the description of the healthcare sector as showing a 'downward trend' contradicts the visual data, which shows a clear increase. The summary lacks a clear overview of the most significant trends, and the reporting of figures is imprecise, making it difficult for the reader to follow the data accurately. To improve, ensure you carefully interpret the visual information before writing and focus on highlighting the most prominent changes over the period.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organised into paragraphs, but the logical progression is weak. While you use some cohesive devices like 'Moreover' and 'Furthermore', they are often used to link contradictory or poorly developed ideas. The transition between sentences is sometimes abrupt, and the referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the phrase 'followed straight'. The structure lacks a cohesive flow that guides the reader through the data effectively. To improve, focus on grouping related information together—for example, discussing sectors that increased versus those that decreased—and use linking words to show clear relationships between the data points.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is limited and sometimes inaccurate. Phrases like 'calibrated in percentage' and 'inclination in the graph' are unnatural and do not accurately describe the data. You rely on repetitive phrasing such as 'showed upward trend' multiple times. There is a lack of precision in describing trends; for example, 'inclination' is not the correct term for a rising line on a graph. To reach a higher band, try to incorporate a wider range of verbs and nouns to describe trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'peaked', 'remained stable', or 'experienced a sharp decline', and ensure your word choices are contextually appropriate.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. There are issues with article usage ('the country US'), subject-verb agreement ('the starting point... was higher... followed upward trend'), and sentence structure. Many sentences are simple or contain awkward phrasing, such as 'the data is calibrated in percentage' instead of 'the data is given in percentages'. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with missing capital letters at the start of sentences. To improve, focus on basic sentence construction, ensuring every sentence has a clear subject and verb, and proofread carefully to correct minor errors in articles and verb tenses.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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