Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-09

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The pie chart shows the information about the rate of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020. I will elaborate the statement and provide the information about the job market in US.

In 1960 the number of healthcare jobs standing between 1.5 to 2 million but In 1980 the number of jobs increases and now it is standing on 5 million. As the years passes the number of healthcare job increases and the job rate hits 10 million in 2000. The number of healthcare job in 2020 is over 15 million.

The number of agriculture jobs reduce a lot over the years. In 1960 the number of agriculture jobs is over 5 million but as the year passes the rate of agriculture jobs fall very badly and it is standing between 2.5 to 3 million in 1980 and continued dropping. There is not a lot of difference between 1980 and 2000 but in 2020 it decrease more and standing between 2 to 2.5 million.

The retail companies offered over 5 million jobs in 1960 and it is continued increasing and hit 10 million in 1980 and still not stop as they touched 15 million in 2000 and then it increases a little bit in 2020.

The number of Manufacturing companies offered 15 million jobs in 1960 and 20 million 2020 but over the years the job market fall and standing between 16 to 17 million and continued dropping and comes between 12.5 to 13 million.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses the task by describing the trends in four sectors. However, it fails to provide a clear overview or summary of the main features, which is a requirement for Task 1. The description is largely a list of data points rather than a synthesis of trends. Furthermore, the introduction is weak, as it mentions a 'pie chart' when the data is clearly a line graph, and the personal statement 'I will elaborate the statement' is inappropriate for an academic report. To improve, you should group the sectors by their overall trends (e.g., those that increased versus those that decreased) and provide a concise summary of the most significant changes.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The response is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is very limited and repetitive. Phrases like 'as the years passes' and 'the number of... increases' are used mechanically. There is a lack of linking words to connect ideas within and between sentences, making the flow feel disjointed. To achieve a higher band, you should use a wider variety of cohesive devices such as 'consequently,' 'in contrast,' 'while,' and 'subsequently' to show the relationship between the data points and the passage of time.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is quite limited and repetitive. You frequently use basic verbs like 'increase,' 'reduce,' 'fall,' and 'drop.' There is little attempt to use more precise vocabulary related to data description, such as 'fluctuated,' 'peaked,' 'remained stable,' or 'declined gradually.' Additionally, there are some inaccuracies in word choice, such as 'the rate of jobs' when referring to the absolute number of jobs. To improve, try to incorporate a more varied range of vocabulary to describe trends and avoid repeating the same sentence structures and verbs throughout the report.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response relies heavily on simple sentence structures. There are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'the number of healthcare job increases') and tense consistency (e.g., 'the number of agriculture jobs is over 5 million' when referring to 1960). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with missing commas and capitalization errors. While the meaning is generally clear, the lack of complex sentence structures and the frequency of errors in basic grammar prevent the response from reaching a higher band. Focusing on correct verb tenses for past data and using complex sentences would significantly improve your score.

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